Steelers at 1/8 Pole: Fact or Mumbo-Jumbo

'09 Steelers at 1/8 pole:  Fact or MumboJumbo?

As the Pittsburgh Steelers begin their season in pursuit of a 7th Lombardi Trophy, an angst has overtaken the good citizenry of the Steel City , a metropolis that lives and dies with its football team.  The fortunes of the Steelers have been uneven, winning their opener at home in overtime, yet one more comeback win for Big Ben & Company when the chips were down in the 4th quarter.  The next week, however, just when the Steelers seemed ready to roll Da Bears, the skies opened up, the Super Bowl MVP could no longer catch, or even stand upright, and the kicker, of whom his coach has said, "You can't ice a psychopath," missed not one, but a pair, of potentially game-winning kicks.

The backdrop to the melancholy populace is the G-20 economic summit, held this week in Pittsburgh .  At first, being one who walks around with my head in the sand ( I know that's a tough trick), I thought G-20 was a Steelers dive play, run behind Kemo.  But Pittsburghers have been kept out of their own City, while the red carpet's laid out for a group of bimbos from Swaziland and Khazakstan.  Only entry to the City is by a group of nutcases rapelling from the City's many bridges.

Anyway, here's the hot topics in Pittsburgh , re: the Black & Gold.  Is it fact, or is it MumboJumbo??

Steelers should run 3-Wide as their base offense:

I've been beating this drum since summer!!  Steelers ran 3-wides as in '08 more than all other offensive sets combined.  Then it morphs into, "Base is the offense that we run on 1st & 10."  Okay...Steelers ran 3 wides on 1st & 10 more than any other offensive set.  "No, Base is the offense that we run to start the game."  Hmmm....Steelers came out for their first snap in the Super Bowl with 3 tights...that their Base?

Add in that Steelers went 3 wides for 75% of the plays against Tennessee and 68% of the plays against Chicago , and you have your answer.

Answer:  MumboJumbo!!

Steelers run multiple tight end sets all the time:

Steelers usage of 2 tight-end sets is runner-up to 3 wides in popularity, but it's a very, very distant second.  Whereas, Steelers will run 3 wides a dozen plays in a row in spots, vs. Chicago , there were only 3 occasions where Steelers ran 2 tights on consecutive plays, topping out at 3 plays in a row.

Answer:  MumboJumbo!!

Scrap the Bunch formation; it never works:

Steelers have trouble running from the Bunch, but have used it to both create separation for the bunched receivers, as well as create a one-on-one on other side of the formation, usually for Santonio.  Steelers were 4 for 5 passing, 56 yards, out of the bunch v. Chicago

Answer:  MumboJumbo!!

Steelers O-Line sucks; we can't run for beans:

Who among us thought we'd run against Tennessee ?  Not me?  Steelers actually did run okay vs. Chicago , particularly to the right side, particularly with Kemo leading the play.  This G-power (is THAT related to the G-20?) produced 79 of the Steelers 103 rushing yards.  Line struggles on 3rd & short.  Runs rarely have been effective on 3rd & short, and Ben's sacked an inordinate amount in this down/distance, 9 times last year, 2 so far this year.  To me, the most shocking call in last year's SB was Steelers running Gary Russell between the tackles on 3rd & a very long one.  I was even more surprised that it worked. Pass Pro, once past 1Q of the Tennessee game, has been solid.

Answer:  Some truth, some MumboJumbo!!

Tyrone Carter; leave him the hell home in Pittsburgh .  He sucked last week:

Tyrone Carter brings the heat.  He hits like a ton of bricks.  IMO, was Dick LeBeau that sucked last week.  Ty Carter ain't all that fast.  Ty Carter can't cover all that well.  Third & goal for the Bears from the Steelers 7, 4Q, Steelers up 7, haven't gotten to Cutler all day.  What's LeBeau do?  Brings the heat on Cutler, leaves Carter on an island defending the speedy Johnny Cocks.  What a surprise.  Bears touchdown.

Answer:  Carter did suck, but it waddn't his fault....MumboJumbo!!

Jeff Reed's an alcoholic deadbeat.  He blew the game.

True...but.  Some posters this week, wrote that they didn't remember the last time Skippy missed a game-winning kick.  Hey Lamebrain!!  You don't remember 'cause it never happened.  That's right; 8th year in the league, and last week was the first, and second I guess, time, that this guy has failed when called upon to win the game with his toe.  Good thing there were no paper towel dispensers in site. 

Answer:  True, but I'm giving Skippy a mulligan on that one!!

STEELERS-BENGALS:

This week, Steelers go into the friendly confines of Paul Brown Stadium, where they win every year, and twice in '05.  Steelers haven't lost in this joint since '01, the one and only game that Bill Cowher (yes...that effin' turncoat Carolina Hurricane Bill Cowher) lost after leading by 11 points.  It's also the same joint in which Kimo (yeah...that Kimo) blew out Carson Palmer's knee, whereupon The Homosexual Carson Palmer left the stadium, went the hell home, before halftime, with his team holding a 10-point lead.  Way to be a leader, Carson.  I had to read the article three times to make sure I read it right.  Same game, Joey Porter (my favorite ex-Steeler....he not only gets a waiver from my hoping he breaks  his effin' leg, as do all ex-Steelers that have helped us win SBs; he also earns a waiver from my hoping that he "toils in obscurity for the balance of his career"...see chapter in Manifesto entitled, "Rooting for Injuries") taunts the Cincy fans, those remaining at the end.  "You make me tired," says Peezy, "I'm tired of kickin' y'all asses."  Classic Peezy...loved that guy.

Bad historical precedent for this game.  Post-SB XL, '06, Steelers at 1-1, lose to the Bengals due to a pair of lamebrained calls by The Effin' Turncoat Bill Cowher.  First, we're kickin' their all asses again, leading 7-0, running the ball up their asses, 1st & goal from their 5, and we throw it, and it's picked.  'Bout 8 minutes left, Steelers lead by 3, Bengals can't do a goddamn thing on offense. They punt.  The Knucklehead Cowher, who would later say, "I like Santonio's hands on punt runbacks close to our goal line," puts Ricardo Colclough back to field the punt.  One small problem.  Colclough can't catch.  He fumbles, Bengals recover, touchdown, Steelers lose.  What the hell, Cowher....8 minutes left, your return guy lines up at the 15...do you think the premium should have been placed on the guy that can catch the ball.

The Queen City (right.. Queens  living in Cincy) will be fired up...well, to the extent that's possible with this combo of Cincinnati homosexuals and Kentucky hicks.  I think there's bad blood in this game.  I think at least a pair of Bengals get either knocked the f out, or sustain a serious injury, for which the Steelers are accused of cheap-shotting, like the Steelers care about that.  My proudest moment of the post-season was at the NFL Meetings, where those Pussification of the NFL was advanced.  The Brady Rule, the Hines Ward Rule...all these wimp-ass rules put into effect.  There was Marvin Lewis & Jack Del Rio, practically holding hands, looking like PTSD victims as they talked about the horrid injuries that their players had suffered.   Four pieces of film were shown to support the rules changes.  Three of the four clips were of Pittsburgh Steelers blowing people the f UP!!  Then, when the vote is taken on these wimp-ass rules, the assclown Rich McKay, says, "So the vote's unanimous." Then, realizing that he's misspoke says, "Oh...one vote against... Pittsburgh ."  I LOVED it.  Made me proud to be from Pittsburgh , root for the only badass, non-pussified team in the entire NFL.

One last thing...my niece's BF, nice kid, 15 years old.  He's a Bengals fan.  I tell him I've never met a Bengals fan.  He says, "Well, I'm from Cincinnati ."  Duh....no shit!  Why else would anyone root for these assclowns if they didn't  have to 'cause they were born there.   Anyway, I got this kid's cell number...he doesn't know mine.  I'll be texting his little ass the whole game.  "Hey gaybo, Bengals suck....hahahahaa!!"  He won't know who it is.

Skippy bounces back....Steelers make Ochocinco STFU. 

Steelers win, oh...say...20-13.