SB Nation Pittsburgh Editor's Pick
Comparing Steelers Place Kickers to Old Girlfriends
by Anthony Defeo on Nov 17, 2010 12:06 AM EST
Email
PrintBump, bump. Got to reward fun, tasteful creativity like this. Many thanks to Anthony for being such a vocal contributor lately, but a special tip of the cap for this, his to-date pièce de résistance. Well done by him. - Michael Bean -
***********
Matt Bahr was the Steelers' placekicker when I started following them. Bahr was like that girl you called your "girlfriend" when you were about 9 years old, but she wasn't really your girlfriend. I mean, you were only 9. Your parents thought it was cute that you had a little friend like that and they'd often take you over to her house so you guys could have little play dates. It was just so adorable. You may have even shared your first kiss with her on the swings at the playground. But eventually, she moved out of the neighborhood and you never saw her again.
And then there was David Trout. He was like the girl you went to the movies with once in the 6th or 7th grade. She probably liked you more than you liked her. You were kind of a jerk to her because she wore braces and smelled like raspberries. It didn't really last long.
Ah, but then there was Gary Anderson. He was like your high school sweetheart. You met her during your freshman year and the two of you were together always. You were practically married even though you were only teenagers and still in high school. You considered her family your family and vice versa. You continued to date her all throughout college and the two of you often talked about getting married. There was no doubt this was going to be the girl you spent the rest of your life with. Sadly, however, she wanted to study abroad after college. You didn't want her to go, but you knew that it was very important to her. You didn't want to do the long-distance thing, so you just parted ways. It was the most difficult thing you ever had to do. No matter what, you'll always consider her your soulmate.
And who could forget about Norm Johnson? Norm was like that woman you met while on a Caribbean cruise. You had a wonderful couple of weeks with her. You both knew it couldn't really go any further than that, but it was fun, and you often find yourself thinking of her and smiling.
Then there was Kris Brown. He was like the really attractive girl you dated once you got into your mid-twenties or so. At first glance, she was everything you were looking for, and you had so much in common with her. However, over time, you realized that you really didn't have much in common. And she was kind of possessive and wanted to monopolize all of your time. She even made you get rid of your friends. Finally, you have enough of this head case. I mean, looks only go so far. You dump her and move on.
After that, it was Todd Peterson. The blind date from hell. What were your friends thinking?
And, finally, there's Jeff Reed. Reed is like that girl you met while out at a bar. You didn't go to the bar to meet women. That's not your style. You were just there to have a good time with your friends. Besides, you didn't even feel like dating any more. You've practically sworn off relationships. But the more you talk to this girl, the more you like her. Yeah, sure, she's not really your type, but she's so much fun. She even hits it off with your friends. Just a really cool girl.
The two of you start to date, and before long, you're going out every night. You can't believe that you've fallen for this girl. She's so much different than every girl you've ever met. You introduce her to your family, and they like the fact that she's a little off the beaten path. Besides, she's so attractive and smart, and loves you. Your happiness is the only thing your family is concerned with. The relationship starts to get more and more serious, and one day you decide that she's the woman you want to spend your life with, and soon, you're married.
Things are great in the beginning, but conflict soon arises because she still likes to go out and party practically every night, and you're at the point where you want to settle down and have a family. After all, you are in your 30's now and so is she. You fight about it, but at the end of the day, you still love her and when you're with her, life is good. Sadly, however, as the years go by, she's still hanging out at the bars, and you hardly ever see her. In the beginning, you could always count on her being there for you, but now, you never see her and you can't depend on her any longer. You're also fearful that she's becoming an alcoholic. You confront her about it, but she has no interest in changing and she tells you that it's all your fault.
Part of you still wants to save the marriage, but it takes two and she just isn't willing. Time goes by and now you start to resent her, and the two of you barely speak at all. And when she does talk to you, it's nothing but put downs and insults. Plus, you start to suspect that she's having an affair. And how could you not? She's never home at all any more. You no longer have any interest in saving the marriage and you just want out. You wait and wait for her to screw up one more time, and when she finally does, it's the out you need. You serve her divorce papers and kick her to the curb. Sure, it's an ugly divorce, but you're better off apart and you move on.
The end.
143 comments
|
Add comment
|
34 recs |
Do you like this story?
Comments
thanks but
i didnt make it. swiped it off the interwebs somewhere
Bravo
what a brilliant way of breaking down the Kicker situation. So what does this make Suisham, a one night stand.
Players who should be in the Hall of Fame: Pat TIllman, Dwight White, Donnie Shell, L.C. Greenwood, Ray Guy, Steve Tasker, Jack Butler, Greg Llyod, Andy Russel, Cris Carter, Kevin Greene and Jerry Kramer
"Its too bad that NHL is taken because the National Football League has become the National Hypocrite League" Mark Schlereth
Canal Street Chronicles resident Steelers Fan
I think that is exactly what it is
wham bam, thank you ma’am.
Steelers football is 60 mins. The final 15 have been re-constructed with re-enforced steel and ready to withstand punishment and deal out some itself. HERE WE GO STEELERS HERE WE GO.
by tannofsteel84 on Nov 17, 2010 9:01 AM EST up reply actions
you do have to specify which kind of one night stand
This is the one thats been around, you know it, but its almost closing time, one last call for alcohol, hope you find a friend. A pity night stand?
good use of Semisonic lyrics
Self-praise is for losers. Be a winner. Stand for something. Always have class, and be humble.-- John Madden
by steelcitysweetheart on Nov 17, 2010 11:44 AM EST up reply actions
rebound
while drunk
"I don't mind being a symbol but I don't want to become a monument. There are monuments all over the Parliament Buildings and I've seen what the pigeons do to them."
"Canada is like an old cow. The West feeds it. Ontario and Quebec milk it. And you can well imagine what it's doing in the Maritimes."
Tommy Douglas
by Cold_Old_Steelers_Fan on Nov 18, 2010 9:42 AM EST up reply actions
a rebound
We’ll use him then kick him to the curb when we find someone worth replacing him with.
"I was in the right place at the right time. It was zone coverage, and he ran through my zone...That was a good, clean, legal hit. I put my head across the bow. To be honest, I laid off him a little bit. I could have put a lot more into him." -James Harrison on the Massaquoi hit
On the Cribbs hit: "I thought Cribbs was asleep," Harrison said. "A hit like that geeks you up, especially when you find out the guy is not really hurt, he's just sleeping. He's knocked out but he's going to be OK."
by count'em_six on Nov 17, 2010 12:36 PM EST up reply actions
maybe suisham is
like that sweetheart waitress down the street who you had a little crush on a few years ago, but neither of you took it seriously because you were married and happy. so she kept dating, had a couple boyfriends here and there, and you both kept on living. but now you run into her and find that you’re both single at the right time. maybe it’s a rebound thing, or maybe she was the right girl all along.
keeping my fingers crossed for the latter…
p.s. your post was pretty great. thanks :)
I might say that was Piotr Czech…
Xbox Live Gamertag - IMIeursault currently MW2 and Madden 11.
Official BTSC representative in the Xbox Live Online Franshise 2010.
http://www.youtube.com/user/infamousxBouncers sub to it for commentary's of the games in the online franchise aswell as other Madden and Call of Duty gameplay.
by Josh Roberts (ESGB) on Nov 17, 2010 5:52 PM EST up reply actions
Most likely that rebound girlfriend who sticks around long enough for you to regret it, and look fondly at that alcoholic you just got rid of.
by Phantaskippy on Nov 19, 2010 11:12 PM EST up reply actions
Clever as hell and well written
but kinda a realisation for me, something that is probably unnecessary to tell y’all but I’ll do it anyway.
The bit about Anderson made me realise something, me going away to France might be the end for me and my girlfriend, even though we’ve said we’ll stay together and won’t let it stop us. She really does seem to be the only girl I’ll ever love but as you said, that doesn’t always mean being together forever. What girl wants to be with someone who is thousands of miles away for 4 months, then home for 2 then going away for another 3 then home another month then moving to a city far away from her? This has kinda fucked with my mojo about going away.
No idea why I felt the need to write that here, but I did.
Xbox Live Gamertag - IMIeursault currently MW2 and Madden 11.
Official BTSC representative in the Xbox Live Online Franshise 2010.
http://www.youtube.com/user/infamousxBouncers sub to it for commentary's of the games in the online franchise aswell as other Madden and Call of Duty gameplay.
by Josh Roberts (ESGB) on Nov 16, 2010 10:58 PM EST reply actions
oh man cheer up kid
ur still young. If its meant to be its meant to be. It sounds cliche but enjoy life
"Franco made that play because he never quit on the play. He kept running, he kept hustling. Good things happen to people who hustle."
You’re still young too Danny!
Xbox Live Gamertag - IMIeursault currently MW2 and Madden 11.
Official BTSC representative in the Xbox Live Online Franshise 2010.
http://www.youtube.com/user/infamousxBouncers sub to it for commentary's of the games in the online franchise aswell as other Madden and Call of Duty gameplay.
by Josh Roberts (ESGB) on Nov 16, 2010 11:03 PM EST up reply actions
oh shit i forget
haha
"Franco made that play because he never quit on the play. He kept running, he kept hustling. Good things happen to people who hustle."
Dude Frace isn't as far away from her as it would be for someone from where I am
you just have the Channel, we have an entire ocean
Players who should be in the Hall of Fame: Pat TIllman, Dwight White, Donnie Shell, L.C. Greenwood, Ray Guy, Steve Tasker, Jack Butler, Greg Llyod, Andy Russel, Cris Carter, Kevin Greene and Jerry Kramer
"Its too bad that NHL is taken because the National Football League has become the National Hypocrite League" Mark Schlereth
Canal Street Chronicles resident Steelers Fan
by WVPiratesfan on Nov 16, 2010 11:06 PM EST up reply actions
How does Mexico sound though?
Distance is distance, no chance of seeing each other, be it France or Mexico (that is Summer 2011 for me maybe)
Xbox Live Gamertag - IMIeursault currently MW2 and Madden 11.
Official BTSC representative in the Xbox Live Online Franshise 2010.
http://www.youtube.com/user/infamousxBouncers sub to it for commentary's of the games in the online franchise aswell as other Madden and Call of Duty gameplay.
by Josh Roberts (ESGB) on Nov 16, 2010 11:09 PM EST up reply actions
Mexico sounds cool... to vacation.
"Franco made that play because he never quit on the play. He kept running, he kept hustling. Good things happen to people who hustle."
Don’t want to be cliche, Josh, but take it from a guy who has been around the block a whole shit load of times. Whatever is going to happen is going to happen, for all the right reasons. If it doesn’t work out at some point down the road, whenever that may be, there will be another put further down the road that will have you happy it didn’t work out. Believe.
+1
"Franco made that play because he never quit on the play. He kept running, he kept hustling. Good things happen to people who hustle."
I understand it sounds kinda dramatic and all that, wish I hadn’t posted it now really, but c’est la vie.
I am just wondering if this is a bad decision or not, I don’t want to lose someone so special.
Xbox Live Gamertag - IMIeursault currently MW2 and Madden 11.
Official BTSC representative in the Xbox Live Online Franshise 2010.
http://www.youtube.com/user/infamousxBouncers sub to it for commentary's of the games in the online franchise aswell as other Madden and Call of Duty gameplay.
by Josh Roberts (ESGB) on Nov 16, 2010 11:23 PM EST up reply actions
If it is that good,
you can survive the distance. Long distance relationships can work, but they require absolute commitment and a lot of hard work from both parties. It also requires not hanging out with people of the opposite sex too much, especially if they are single, and if you are drinking. The question is, are you both that committed to it? Only one way to find out.
"You learn more in failure than you do in success." - Mike Tomlin
by Rebecca Rollett on Nov 16, 2010 11:45 PM EST up reply actions
I know we both are,we’ve already talked it all through and it should be cool. Doesn’t stop the doubts though.
I have the problem of being super friendly with any girl though, and I also love going out. Thankfully she really isn’t the jealous type.
Xbox Live Gamertag - IMIeursault currently MW2 and Madden 11.
Official BTSC representative in the Xbox Live Online Franshise 2010.
http://www.youtube.com/user/infamousxBouncers sub to it for commentary's of the games in the online franchise aswell as other Madden and Call of Duty gameplay.
by Josh Roberts (ESGB) on Nov 17, 2010 12:25 AM EST up reply actions
IT's good she is not the jealous type
but you want to be careful and not take advantage of that
Things can always be worse....
I wouldn’t do that. I can stay really close friends with the girls I used to be really close to despite Gem. It’s not normally like that with girlfriends.
Xbox Live Gamertag - IMIeursault currently MW2 and Madden 11.
Official BTSC representative in the Xbox Live Online Franshise 2010.
http://www.youtube.com/user/infamousxBouncers sub to it for commentary's of the games in the online franchise aswell as other Madden and Call of Duty gameplay.
by Josh Roberts (ESGB) on Nov 17, 2010 10:49 PM EST up reply actions
be vigilant
i have the blessing/curse of being much more suited to female company than male. no real hanging out man friends, but women? yeah, that’ll get you in trouble while in a relationship.
if you’re truly committed, you may have to change what you do – not that “something” would happen because you’re a dirtbag, but because you’re a man, men are weak, and women are so very enticing…
by lamarr_the_BEAST! on Nov 17, 2010 10:15 AM EST up reply actions
I'm pretty good at resisting temptation
mainly because she is the most beautiful girl I’ve ever met, so temptation isn’t too much of an issue.
Xbox Live Gamertag - IMIeursault currently MW2 and Madden 11.
Official BTSC representative in the Xbox Live Online Franshise 2010.
http://www.youtube.com/user/infamousxBouncers sub to it for commentary's of the games in the online franchise aswell as other Madden and Call of Duty gameplay.
by Josh Roberts (ESGB) on Nov 17, 2010 10:50 PM EST up reply actions
Does she read this blog? Is that the reason for the compliments?
I kid, I kid… Good luck with transition ESGB. I was never successful with my long distance relationships so I don’t have good advice for you on how to make it work.
The good news is that technology has grown to the point where you can still be in really good touch no matter how far apart you are.
Be optimistic, hope and plan for the best.
by Chicago Steeler on Nov 18, 2010 9:31 AM EST up reply actions
Nope, she tells me to stop going on “stupid american football” websites whenever I check out BTSC when she’s around.
Xbox Live Gamertag - IMIeursault currently MW2 and Madden 11.
Official BTSC representative in the Xbox Live Online Franshise 2010.
http://www.youtube.com/user/infamousxBouncers sub to it for commentary's of the games in the online franchise aswell as other Madden and Call of Duty gameplay.
by Josh Roberts (ESGB) on Nov 18, 2010 1:30 PM EST up reply actions
I've convinced her
to watch the Steelers play next time they’re on TV at 6pm here.
It’s start at least.
Xbox Live Gamertag - IMIeursault currently MW2 and Madden 11.
Official BTSC representative in the Xbox Live Online Franshise 2010.
http://www.youtube.com/user/infamousxBouncers sub to it for commentary's of the games in the online franchise aswell as other Madden and Call of Duty gameplay.
by Josh Roberts (ESGB) on Nov 18, 2010 2:20 PM EST up reply actions
progess
step by step
Players who should be in the Hall of Fame: Pat TIllman, Dwight White, Donnie Shell, L.C. Greenwood, Ray Guy, Steve Tasker, Jack Butler, Greg Llyod, Andy Russel, Cris Carter, Kevin Greene and Jerry Kramer
"Its too bad that NHL is taken because the National Football League has become the National Hypocrite League" Mark Schlereth
Canal Street Chronicles resident Steelers Fan
by WVPiratesfan on Nov 18, 2010 3:39 PM EST up reply actions
day by day
"Franco made that play because he never quit on the play. He kept running, he kept hustling. Good things happen to people who hustle."
Move by move
Players who should be in the Hall of Fame: Pat TIllman, Dwight White, Donnie Shell, L.C. Greenwood, Ray Guy, Steve Tasker, Jack Butler, Greg Llyod, Andy Russel, Cris Carter, Kevin Greene and Jerry Kramer
"Its too bad that NHL is taken because the National Football League has become the National Hypocrite League" Mark Schlereth
Canal Street Chronicles resident Steelers Fan
by WVPiratesfan on Nov 18, 2010 4:40 PM EST up reply actions
down by down
When the tailgate drops, the BS stops. Shut up and play!
With all due respect, Mr. Goodell... a 2 week notice will not be necessary. Get yourself a little box, pack your stuff and retire. There will be no party for you...but we're going to have a helluva party after you're gone. Buh-bye!
we'll get there
Players who should be in the Hall of Fame: Pat TIllman, Dwight White, Donnie Shell, L.C. Greenwood, Ray Guy, Steve Tasker, Jack Butler, Greg Llyod, Andy Russel, Cris Carter, Kevin Greene and Jerry Kramer
"Its too bad that NHL is taken because the National Football League has become the National Hypocrite League" Mark Schlereth
Canal Street Chronicles resident Steelers Fan
by WVPiratesfan on Nov 19, 2010 4:10 PM EST up reply actions
now it is a matter of getting new international fans
we must fire him
Players who should be in the Hall of Fame: Pat TIllman, Dwight White, Donnie Shell, L.C. Greenwood, Ray Guy, Steve Tasker, Jack Butler, Greg Llyod, Andy Russel, Cris Carter, Kevin Greene and Jerry Kramer
"Its too bad that NHL is taken because the National Football League has become the National Hypocrite League" Mark Schlereth
Canal Street Chronicles resident Steelers Fan
by WVPiratesfan on Nov 19, 2010 6:14 PM EST up reply actions
this
+1
momma knows best :)
Steelers football is 60 mins. The final 15 have been re-constructed with re-enforced steel and ready to withstand punishment and deal out some itself. HERE WE GO STEELERS HERE WE GO.
by tannofsteel84 on Nov 17, 2010 9:03 AM EST up reply actions
The bright side
look at the bright side, at least you have a “Reed” to look forward to.
People don't ever seem to realize that doing what's right is no guarantee against misfortune.
- William McFee
by stillergorillar on Nov 17, 2010 8:37 AM EST up reply actions
Alright, I'm gonna chime in late here
Listen, first of all, it can be done. I met a girl when I was a German high school exchange student in the US and now, 5 years later, I study in the US and that girl is my fiancee. After I went home first, I didn’t see her for an entire year. Then she visited me for about a month, I didn’t see her for 6 months, I visited her, and so on… for 3 years. Was it hard as hell? You bet. Was it worth it? Every second.
I guess what I’m trying to say is that it is not impossible to have such a long distance relationship. Sounds cheesy, but if you both are willing to make it work and really have deep feelings for each other, it will work. If not, it just wasn’t meant to be. Don’t let it fuck with your mojo… One thing’s for sure, every time you are together with her will be an absolute joy.
Cheer up Bro
if two people want to make it work then it will work.
Steelers football is 60 mins. The final 15 have been re-constructed with re-enforced steel and ready to withstand punishment and deal out some itself. HERE WE GO STEELERS HERE WE GO.
by tannofsteel84 on Nov 17, 2010 9:02 AM EST up reply actions
Rec'd and Facebook Like
Defeo this is great work. Keep it up man. So Suisham is the rebound.
"Franco made that play because he never quit on the play. He kept running, he kept hustling. Good things happen to people who hustle."
I think he is the one night stand to get over what you just went through
Players who should be in the Hall of Fame: Pat TIllman, Dwight White, Donnie Shell, L.C. Greenwood, Ray Guy, Steve Tasker, Jack Butler, Greg Llyod, Andy Russel, Cris Carter, Kevin Greene and Jerry Kramer
"Its too bad that NHL is taken because the National Football League has become the National Hypocrite League" Mark Schlereth
Canal Street Chronicles resident Steelers Fan
by WVPiratesfan on Nov 16, 2010 11:04 PM EST up reply actions
i just hope we dont go back to Reed
after a split in a marriage, there is a high percentage of coming back
"Franco made that play because he never quit on the play. He kept running, he kept hustling. Good things happen to people who hustle."
Rebound
Normally you don’t see with clarity when you do the rebound thing, so what do we know about this Suisham?
What’s the pedigree on that leg?
He came from Washington, San Fran, Dallas (not in that order), why did he move so much, and what makes him the man for Heinz Field?
"He was popping off down there the first time they were about to score. So you run your mouth, expect to get something. Everything's between the lines, so he got what he had coming. He was running his mouth and getting in the way of the train, and the train wasn't coming off the track."
-James Harrison on Kyle Orton
When I saw 3 recs and only 7 comments in a very short period of time I knew only a few people had read but a high percentage rec’d, so I figured it was going to be good. I was not disappointed.
Well done.
the title got me
Players who should be in the Hall of Fame: Pat TIllman, Dwight White, Donnie Shell, L.C. Greenwood, Ray Guy, Steve Tasker, Jack Butler, Greg Llyod, Andy Russel, Cris Carter, Kevin Greene and Jerry Kramer
"Its too bad that NHL is taken because the National Football League has become the National Hypocrite League" Mark Schlereth
Canal Street Chronicles resident Steelers Fan
by WVPiratesfan on Nov 16, 2010 11:26 PM EST up reply actions
Thanks everyone. I'm just impressed that I was able to remember David Trout.
I don’t know what Suisham is in all this mess. Maybe they should forget about place kickers for now and just try two-point conversion.
PS,
You just know this Sunday’s game is going to come down to a last second field goal.
Well, if it does,
we’re probably screwed.
"You learn more in failure than you do in success." - Mike Tomlin
by Rebecca Rollett on Nov 16, 2010 11:47 PM EST up reply actions
In which case, like Queen Victoria,
we should just lay back and think of England.
"You learn more in failure than you do in success." - Mike Tomlin
by Rebecca Rollett on Nov 17, 2010 10:07 PM EST up reply actions
Good Reference
Xbox Live Gamertag - IMIeursault currently MW2 and Madden 11.
Official BTSC representative in the Xbox Live Online Franshise 2010.
http://www.youtube.com/user/infamousxBouncers sub to it for commentary's of the games in the online franchise aswell as other Madden and Call of Duty gameplay.
by Josh Roberts (ESGB) on Nov 17, 2010 10:51 PM EST up reply actions
Most enjoyable.
Only it made me feel sad at the end. Which is appropriate, because I’m really sad for Jeff, and I really hope that a fresh start somewhere else lets him get his head in order.
"You learn more in failure than you do in success." - Mike Tomlin
by Rebecca Rollett on Nov 16, 2010 11:47 PM EST reply actions
Is there a team in Utah yet?
Xbox Live Gamertag - IMIeursault currently MW2 and Madden 11.
Official BTSC representative in the Xbox Live Online Franshise 2010.
http://www.youtube.com/user/infamousxBouncers sub to it for commentary's of the games in the online franchise aswell as other Madden and Call of Duty gameplay.
by Josh Roberts (ESGB) on Nov 17, 2010 12:26 AM EST up reply actions
not to my knowledge
I’m sure there is a UFL team in a low population spot though.
Players who should be in the Hall of Fame: Pat TIllman, Dwight White, Donnie Shell, L.C. Greenwood, Ray Guy, Steve Tasker, Jack Butler, Greg Llyod, Andy Russel, Cris Carter, Kevin Greene and Jerry Kramer
"Its too bad that NHL is taken because the National Football League has become the National Hypocrite League" Mark Schlereth
Canal Street Chronicles resident Steelers Fan
by WVPiratesfan on Nov 17, 2010 1:01 AM EST up reply actions
hmmmm . . . one of these on offensive coordinators would be interesting . . .
. . . for me . . . bruce arians would be the girl that would wind me up and get me so hot and bothered . . . (yes, yes . . .!!) . . . and not let me score . . . just a field goal every now and then . . .
by VIN K on Nov 17, 2010 12:28 AM EST reply actions 5 recs
lol
too funny
Steelers football is 60 mins. The final 15 have been re-constructed with re-enforced steel and ready to withstand punishment and deal out some itself. HERE WE GO STEELERS HERE WE GO.
by tannofsteel84 on Nov 17, 2010 9:06 AM EST up reply actions
ARIANS FOR ME...
… is more like the kid in school who told you he had the answers for the History test…
and if you would just let him hang with you, he’ll give you the test answers.
You get the answers, take the test and fail…. big time!
His response is, “the answers worked 3 years ago”…. duuuuhhh, shame on us.
The Burgh - Been there, played the game, have the gameshirt.
Once from the Confluence, always from the Confluence.
by Hollywood Steel on Nov 18, 2010 12:44 PM EST up reply actions 1 recs
haha rec
"Franco made that play because he never quit on the play. He kept running, he kept hustling. Good things happen to people who hustle."
Can I just call him Sushi?
Had a hard enough time with Sepulvida (hooked on phonics ya know).
I really hope, at some point down the road, Reed remembers his time as a Steeler fondly. I’m sure no one wanted him to be 100% accurate more than he did… It’s just sad that it ended like this. I really wish him the best in both his professional and personal life. (I can’t even imagine what the writers of “Here We Go” are thinking…. I mean “we’ll get 3 points off of Jeff Reed’s toe” just worked….. Suisham?? Writers nightmare.)
Anthony… this was very creative and enjoyable. Thanks!!
When the tailgate drops, the BS stops. Shut up and play!
With all due respect, Mr. Goodell... a 2 week notice will not be necessary. Get yourself a little box, pack your stuff and retire. There will be no party for you...but we're going to have a helluva party after you're gone. Buh-bye!
Good point, gldfan. I still can't spell our punter's name without doing a spellcheck.
Suisham doesn’t exactly roll off the tongue. Maybe he’ll be the next Jeff Reed, at least on the field. But, if we go by my little script here, more likely, he’ll be the David Trout or Todd Peterson that kicks for the team before their next great kicker comes along.
by Anthony Defeo on Nov 17, 2010 9:58 AM EST up reply actions
Great Piece!!!
Thanks!!!
"He was popping off down there the first time they were about to score. So you run your mouth, expect to get something. Everything's between the lines, so he got what he had coming. He was running his mouth and getting in the way of the train, and the train wasn't coming off the track."
-James Harrison on Kyle Orton
Excellent All Around
Excellent all around – Excellent idea, excellent execution! Hats Off!
As for the decision itself, the rational side of me says “this is insane” but the non-rational side of me had been rubbed the wrong way by Reed for a long time. At the end of the day, Tomlin and Colbert are taking a big risk here.
by Hombre de Acero on Nov 17, 2010 6:08 AM EST reply actions
No risk, no reward
Of course it could backfire, hence RISK, but Skippy was more drama-queen than ever and his production was in the crapper. Suisham is the (hopefully) nice, peaceful girl you date after a tumultuous relationship ends. I just hope he can kick.
One of the great disappointments of a football game is that the cheerleaders never seem to get injured.
I heard an interview with him today,
and he sounds very humble, down-to-earth, and a great guy. I don’t know it that will translate into being a great kicker for us, but it sounds like it deserves to. After he lost the job with Washington he and his wife moved back to Ohio to be near her family, and his mother-in-law unexpectedly and suddenly died a few weeks ago. So he felt maybe it was meant to be that they had this time with her.
"You learn more in failure than you do in success." - Mike Tomlin
by Rebecca Rollett on Nov 17, 2010 10:09 PM EST up reply actions
Great read, Anthony!
Having just finalized a divorce, broke up with a fiance´, and started another relationship with a bit of an old flame… all in the same week, this helps bring perspective to an otherwise awkward situation. :^) Thanks!
When you work out your biceps, do you want six little ones? No, of course not--you want one big one; I took the same approach with my ab. -- Me
Great job Anthony
very creative way to describe our “relationships” with our kickers. I just hope that Suisham does not turn out to be the one that when you roll over the next morning, look over at, and think..“WTF did I do?”
Things can always be worse....
indeed
which is one of the reasons to avoid one night stands. But occasionally they do lead to something better, and we have to hope that’s the case.
"You learn more in failure than you do in success." - Mike Tomlin
by Rebecca Rollett on Nov 17, 2010 9:32 AM EST up reply actions
I hate
to admit it, but I did not have long term designs on my fiance. Six years later and that strange little hook up is the best thing that ever happened to me.
People don't ever seem to realize that doing what's right is no guarantee against misfortune.
- William McFee
by stillergorillar on Nov 18, 2010 9:50 AM EST up reply actions
My brother knocked a girl on the first night. They are still together.
Shows that a 1 night stand can lead to something good.
"Franco made that play because he never quit on the play. He kept running, he kept hustling. Good things happen to people who hustle."
WOW
This is your best work AD. Way to go! As my buddy Steel Fever (Steel Spike) says “Wreckage!”
When You Run The Ball Good Things Happen
Thanks for the kind words, Michael and everyone.
I can’t believe I’m receiving so many kudos one day AFTER suggesting that Trai Essex be moved to left tackle. Ah yes, the universe is very kind. Glad you all liked it so much. :)
lol, I didnt see that...was that a joke?
Essex at LT? Only if BB starts throwing with his left arm and Essex goes full roid rage on the DL, like the guy in the Program.
All is forgiven.
Just keep being funny and stop talking about football…
Sorry, couldn’t resist. If everybody who made a bone-headed suggestion was thrown off this blog, there wouldn’t be anybody on it. And who knows – maybe Trai Essex would make a great LT. Probably not, though…
"You learn more in failure than you do in success." - Mike Tomlin
by Rebecca Rollett on Nov 17, 2010 10:12 PM EST up reply actions
It wasn't an unreasonable
suggestion since he’s probably read somewhere that Essex knew both G and T position. Only problem is that he sucks at both of them. You don’t want that kind of position flexibility.
Steelers football is 60 mins. The final 15 have been re-constructed with re-enforced steel and ready to withstand punishment and deal out some itself. HERE WE GO STEELERS HERE WE GO.
by tannofsteel84 on Nov 18, 2010 8:57 AM EST up reply actions
Not only did I read it somewhere, but I remembered it from the end of the '07 season when both Starks and Marvel Smith were down.
He filled in in for at least a couple of games. He didn’t do too badly, as I recall. But like I said the other day, that could have been because Faneca was still there to help him out.
by Anthony Defeo on Nov 18, 2010 5:29 PM EST up reply actions
That's why I love this site
First Momma compares Reed to a horn player; now Anthony comes along and gives us this gem. At first (and to borrow a baseball metaphore) both comparisons seem to come out of left field, and yet both of the posts make sense and were a great read.
Well done!
What's that lousy song again?
To all the girls I’ve loved before
Who travelled in and out my door
I’m glad they came along
I dedicate this song
To all the girls I’ve loved before
So long Skippy.
One of the great disappointments of a football game is that the cheerleaders never seem to get injured.
Czech
he’s that temptress that we thought of breaking up with Reed for. As things get worse, you start to think of what could’ve been.
"I wore my purple camo to the practice, but they wouldn’t let me into the autograph zone. No clue why."- Mr MaLoR
by kick him in the head on Nov 17, 2010 11:50 AM EST reply actions
You're making a run at the all time record in recs here
"I'm from Maryland, and no one can beat me!"
21 I think
Players who should be in the Hall of Fame: Pat TIllman, Dwight White, Donnie Shell, L.C. Greenwood, Ray Guy, Steve Tasker, Jack Butler, Greg Llyod, Andy Russel, Cris Carter, Kevin Greene and Jerry Kramer
"Its too bad that NHL is taken because the National Football League has become the National Hypocrite League" Mark Schlereth
Canal Street Chronicles resident Steelers Fan
by WVPiratesfan on Nov 17, 2010 12:19 PM EST up reply actions
23
"I'm from Maryland, and no one can beat me!"
by John Stephens on Nov 17, 2010 12:36 PM EST up reply actions
I don't think you can
Steelers football is 60 mins. The final 15 have been re-constructed with re-enforced steel and ready to withstand punishment and deal out some itself. HERE WE GO STEELERS HERE WE GO.
by tannofsteel84 on Nov 17, 2010 3:40 PM EST up reply actions
They've been around since 1933...
and while they’re better at commitment then most teams, they’ll still swing when they feel like it.
by Chicago Steeler on Nov 17, 2010 12:52 PM EST up reply actions
SInce this is about kickers
would that mean the Steelers have a foot fetish?
Things can always be worse....
Not compared to some
"You learn more in failure than you do in success." - Mike Tomlin
by Rebecca Rollett on Nov 17, 2010 10:13 PM EST up reply actions
I think Reed is also gonna be the guy
that you remember later as really good in bed. He had one of the best packages out there and knew how to use it, but it came with all the other crap. Plus he couldn’t get it up when he drank, which was more often than you like. You move on and eventually find a nice guy, but you always remember how the other guy rocked your world. You especially remember it when your current guy doesn’t quite hit the spot, even though they are really trying and you know how much they care about your satisfaction.
by Norcal_Roxy on Nov 17, 2010 4:01 PM EST reply actions 7 recs
hehe
Was hoping you or one of our other witty females would throw in an equivalent.
Freel free to email me anytime at behindthesteelcurtain@gmail.com with questions, suggestions, complaints, etc, or to just say what's up. -Michael Bean (Blitz)
by Michael Bean on Nov 17, 2010 4:27 PM EST up reply actions
Yep
there’s always “that one…”
When the tailgate drops, the BS stops. Shut up and play!
With all due respect, Mr. Goodell... a 2 week notice will not be necessary. Get yourself a little box, pack your stuff and retire. There will be no party for you...but we're going to have a helluva party after you're gone. Buh-bye!
lol
"I'm from Maryland, and no one can beat me!"
by John Stephens on Nov 18, 2010 8:20 AM EST up reply actions
Hey, my first Green comment
It figures that a comment like this would break my green cherry :)
by Norcal_Roxy on Nov 18, 2010 12:23 PM EST up reply actions 4 recs
I guess this makes Suisham a short-term fill-in on the rebound.....
…and on-the-rebound types are basically short-term fill-ins by definition. He’s Canadian, so there’s that international flair. (Had a couple of drinks with him at the Canadian Embassy in Washington on July 1st a couple of years ago at the Canada Day celebration)
Hometown girls or girls next door can be keepers. And there’s a kicker at Pitt right now who knows the winds at Heinz Field……..
I would kill everyone in this room for a drop of sweet beer.
- Homer J. Simpson
NICE SHOT Norcal...
… remember also that if he does get it up
but his eyes are blue
he ain’t the real thing!
The Burgh - Been there, played the game, have the gameshirt.
Once from the Confluence, always from the Confluence.
by Hollywood Steel on Nov 18, 2010 12:47 PM EST up reply actions
this should have 27 recs and counting as well as the post
"Franco made that play because he never quit on the play. He kept running, he kept hustling. Good things happen to people who hustle."
Anthony, this was excellent man...
Why I waited this long to read it is beyond me… I regret it. Very, very well done.
I have not yet begun to procrastinate.
by NYSteelersFan4 on Nov 18, 2010 12:14 AM EST reply actions
That's some real conversation for your ass.
by Chicago Steeler on Nov 18, 2010 9:33 AM EST up reply actions
if
your having conversations with your behind then there are problems lol
Steelers football is 60 mins. The final 15 have been re-constructed with re-enforced steel and ready to withstand punishment and deal out some itself. HERE WE GO STEELERS HERE WE GO.
by tannofsteel84 on Nov 18, 2010 11:08 AM EST up reply actions
Just quoting the song
Although I’m much more familiar with the Ben Folds version then the Dr. Dre + Snoop version.
by Chicago Steeler on Nov 18, 2010 11:26 AM EST up reply actions
I love the Ben Folds version too.
I have not yet begun to procrastinate.
by NYSteelersFan4 on Nov 18, 2010 12:32 PM EST up reply actions
Dre and Snoop mention the Steelers in the new track that leaked out...
Just a quick mention really, but I was just listening to it while reading this… ironic.
I have not yet begun to procrastinate.
by NYSteelersFan4 on Nov 18, 2010 12:32 PM EST up reply actions
I was going to complain about the reference.
Xbox Live Gamertag - IMIeursault currently MW2 and Madden 11.
Official BTSC representative in the Xbox Live Online Franshise 2010.
http://www.youtube.com/user/infamousxBouncers sub to it for commentary's of the games in the online franchise aswell as other Madden and Call of Duty gameplay.
by Josh Roberts (ESGB) on Nov 18, 2010 11:55 PM EST up reply actions
Who whata thought, it figure.
I have not yet begun to procrastinate.
by NYSteelersFan4 on Nov 19, 2010 11:24 AM EST up reply actions
Wuts wrong with Alanis?
I mean, I have my dislikes for this particular song because almost all of her references to irony, aren’t ironic at all….
But in general why would a blog ban conversation about a rock singer? lol
There’s gotta be a good story behind this……
Some people think football is a matter of life and death...I assure you, it's much more serious than that."
-Bill Shanky
I can't believe it. Thanks guys!
I promise to remain humble, but I do insist that from now on, you all refer to me as “Mr. Most Popular of All time.” And I would like a fresh bottle of spring water before he post. Other than that, though, I’m still Tony from the block.
by Anthony Defeo on Nov 20, 2010 9:25 AM EST up reply actions
Who is Roy Gerela
Is he that crazy aunt who flerts with you?
by Steeler Nation VA on Nov 20, 2010 8:50 AM EST reply actions
I don't know much about Roy Gerela. He was a little before my time.
The only time I’ve seen Roy Gerela was during the old games on the Steelers Super Bowl dvds that my girlfriend bought me. I don’t know what his career percentage was, but he sure missed a lot of kicks in those games.
by Anthony Defeo on Nov 20, 2010 9:27 AM EST up reply actions
If I'm not mistaken it was somewhere around 60%
and he missed a shit ton of kicks in the SBs he played in
Players who should be in the Hall of Fame: Pat TIllman, Dwight White, Donnie Shell, L.C. Greenwood, Ray Guy, Steve Tasker, Jack Butler, Greg Llyod, Andy Russel, Cris Carter, Kevin Greene and Jerry Kramer
"Its too bad that NHL is taken because the National Football League has become the National Hypocrite League" Mark Schlereth
Canal Street Chronicles resident Steelers Fan
by WVPiratesfan on Nov 20, 2010 11:34 AM EST up reply actions
He did have Gorilla's though
and that made him special.
When the tailgate drops, the BS stops. Shut up and play!
With all due respect, Mr. Goodell... a 2 week notice will not be necessary. Get yourself a little box, pack your stuff and retire. There will be no party for you...but we're going to have a helluva party after you're gone. Buh-bye!
didn't he have to fight the crowd to get his practice balls back a few times
Players who should be in the Hall of Fame: Pat TIllman, Dwight White, Donnie Shell, L.C. Greenwood, Ray Guy, Steve Tasker, Jack Butler, Greg Llyod, Andy Russel, Cris Carter, Kevin Greene and Jerry Kramer
"Its too bad that NHL is taken because the National Football League has become the National Hypocrite League" Mark Schlereth
Canal Street Chronicles resident Steelers Fan
by WVPiratesfan on Nov 20, 2010 1:52 PM EST up reply actions
I think it was more a of free football thing
Players who should be in the Hall of Fame: Pat TIllman, Dwight White, Donnie Shell, L.C. Greenwood, Ray Guy, Steve Tasker, Jack Butler, Greg Llyod, Andy Russel, Cris Carter, Kevin Greene and Jerry Kramer
"Its too bad that NHL is taken because the National Football League has become the National Hypocrite League" Mark Schlereth
Canal Street Chronicles resident Steelers Fan
by WVPiratesfan on Nov 21, 2010 12:38 AM EST up reply actions
Something to say? Choose one of these options to log in.
Secondary Sidebar
User Tools
"Thoughtful discussion with a sense of history."
Art Rooney Jr.
"Level-headed thinking." Pittsburgh Post-Gazette
Related FanPosts on Behind the Steel Curtain
Related FanShots on Behind the Steel Curtain
FanPosts
Community blog posts and discussion.
