One fan's thoughts on *** in public bathrooms
I read a comment on Bleachers by a Steelers fan who had to explain sexual assault to his eight year old son--a son who won't be wearing his "Ben R." child-sized jersey to school again. Ben may or may not be guilty of sexual assault, rape, or whatever--I hope he isn't. However, it appears by his own admission that something sexual occured between him and this young woman--possibly in a nightclub bathroom, and possibly while members of his entourage guarded the door. Again according to Ben, this young woman coincidentally fell and hit her head after this intimacy took place.
To put this in perspective, I thought of myself as a kid--a kid who sniveled while listening to Myron Cope describe the torturous last seconds of the Steelers pending loss to the Raiders in a playoff game...before a miracle occurred. What would that kid have thought of reports describing Terry Bradshaw having sex with co-eds in public bathrooms--co-eds who emerged from the encounter with head injuries and a tale of sexual assualt? What would Art Rooney have thought?
One could also ask why Ben and the woman were in the room together. Did he follow her, or did she follow him? And if the latter, why weren't his "bodyguards" instructed to protect his privacy so this couldn't happen? Regardless, these are questions for the authorities in GA, not Steeler Nation or the city of Pittsburgh. The question we should be asking ourselves is this:
Is it so important that the Steelers win football games that parents should be put in the position of having to explain the meaning of rape or sexual assualt to eight year-olds through the actions of their sports heroes? If it is, I suggest we forget about the Steelers, turn off the TV and Internet, and look at ourselves.
James P. Kelly, formerly of Monaca
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Hopefully by the time next season starts this whole thing will have been figured out
and you won’t have to explain anything to any kid
Brian: Face it Peter, you get competitive about everything.
Peter: I am so not competitive. In fact, I am the least non-competitive. So I win.
by SoCalSteelerFan on Mar 15, 2010 9:22 PM EDT reply actions
And hopefully by that time
He’ll reconsider the titles of his fanposts.
by StoneColdSteel on Mar 15, 2010 9:53 PM EDT up reply actions
well thats the parents fault
u shouldn’t let your kids idolize people. explain to them ahead of time, teach them, and show them that people are flawed and are not worth admiration
Steelers football is 60 mins.
near impossable
Kids are going to admire winners, especially a young man who has brought so much joy to their hometown. Kids have been idolizing coked out rock stars and athletes for years. Only now, stories are getting out there. No matter how much you preach to your children they are going to latch on to the 2 time super bowl winning qb of there favorite team- that is until he commits a crime or has an awful story break and at that point you have to explain.
It is up to parents to educate their kids, but other children, jerseys, video games, fat head posters, and media hype are a lot for parents to fight.
I put this squarely on the heads of the athletes; they are working in an industry where they are literally representing their cities. Its time they show some maturity and own up to the responsibility. If they are going to get wild, do it without harming others.
Rothlesburger is a hell of a football player, turns out he’s a complete prick too. That’s too bad for the city of Pittsburgh. Personally I enjoy the stories behind the players of my favorite team- it brings me closer to the game and children enjoy that too in most cases.
bring Dawk & Westy home
If you have a proper relationship to your children
Those
other children, jerseys, video games, fat head posters, and media hypedon’t have quite the control over them that they otherwise would. My kids carry my values and guess what? They are turned off by the same things I am. Imagine that.
"A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty." - Winston Churchill
You have kids?
poor little Arns :)
Steelers football is 60 mins.
by tannofsteel84 on Mar 16, 2010 10:56 AM EDT up reply actions
They aren't little
"A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty." - Winston Churchill
by PixburghArn on Mar 16, 2010 10:58 AM EDT up reply actions
Well
I can still feel sorry for them :)
Steelers football is 60 mins.
by tannofsteel84 on Mar 16, 2010 11:18 AM EDT up reply actions
Sure you can, but they'll wonder why :)
"A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty." - Winston Churchill
by PixburghArn on Mar 16, 2010 11:24 AM EDT up reply actions
nice come back
Steelers football is 60 mins.
by tannofsteel84 on Mar 16, 2010 11:42 AM EDT up reply actions
listen buddy
No need for the guess what and imagine that
I myself don’t have children but I work with them. There are more elements out of your hands then you realize. People are emotional creatures, they want to like those who are accomplished and portrayed as the hero by the media. That’s how marketing on every level works. If you are naive enough to believe that marketing hasn’t worked on you, or your family then there is no point to this discussion. You have see that unless preach against someone or something specifically (i.e. Big Ben or the NFL) people like him will be idolized by children with high or low values. That is until they commit acts like he has but my point is when it comes to that its already too late. Kids don’t latch on to a player who is question for rape, they latch on far before that and later get dragged into it.
bring Dawk & Westy home
I work with and have kids
I’m not guessing or imagining. I’m suggesting you imagine because it looks like you haven’t grasped that yet.
"A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty." - Winston Churchill
by PixburghArn on Mar 16, 2010 11:13 AM EDT up reply actions
crash boom boom?
"A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty." - Winston Churchill
or is it waddle waddle waddle something?
been a long time
"A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty." - Winston Churchill
Parents do have that control
but fewer and fewer exercise it. Kids today are raised by TV and the intrawebs (thanks, Al Gore…), for the most part.
Also, with kids being raised by nannies and babysitters, a lot of parents have minimal time with their kids. Therefore, it is STILL the parents fault.
"OOH! A piece of candy. OOH! A piece of candy."
-James Woods
by Steel Spike on Mar 16, 2010 11:18 AM EDT up reply actions
Marketing does work
which is the point of this discussion. It is now more imperative than ever to monitor what your kid does online, what they watch on TV, what music they listen to, and talk to them about real life. Don’t sugar coat it. The media isn’t going to do you any favors so don’t do them any. Bush would call it a preemptive strike. :) You get to your child before they do.
Steelers football is 60 mins.
by tannofsteel84 on Mar 16, 2010 11:23 AM EDT up reply actions
I wouldn’t argue about being a parent with someone who IS a parent, if you have 0 experience in that field.
With the 18th pick of the 2010 NFL Draft the Pittsburgh Steelers select Florida QB Tim Tebow. (not a RB!)
by John Stephens on Mar 16, 2010 11:26 AM EDT up reply actions
If you'll recall I went on a pretty good rant about this subject a while ago
"OOH! A piece of candy. OOH! A piece of candy."
-James Woods
by Steel Spike on Mar 16, 2010 11:37 AM EDT up reply actions
I didn’t argue against you. I am only a step father as of now, and not even legally.
With the 18th pick of the 2010 NFL Draft the Pittsburgh Steelers select Florida QB Tim Tebow. (not a RB!)
by John Stephens on Mar 16, 2010 11:55 AM EDT up reply actions
I know you didn't
Just ruminating on the subject.
"OOH! A piece of candy. OOH! A piece of candy."
-James Woods
by Steel Spike on Mar 16, 2010 12:28 PM EDT up reply actions
There is no greater power than creating life...
"OOH! A piece of candy. OOH! A piece of candy."
-James Woods
having the triforce?
With the 18th pick of the 2010 NFL Draft the Pittsburgh Steelers select Florida QB Tim Tebow. (not a RB!)
by John Stephens on Mar 16, 2010 1:41 PM EDT up reply actions
Huh?
Is that some gamer nerd reference?
"OOH! A piece of candy. OOH! A piece of candy."
-James Woods
YOU'RE A NERD, NERD!
With the 18th pick of the 2010 NFL Draft the Pittsburgh Steelers select Florida QB Tim Tebow. (not a RB!)
by John Stephens on Mar 16, 2010 1:48 PM EDT up reply actions
I'm a music and movie nerd
Most definitely NOT a gamer nerd…
You didn’t answer my question (it was serious, even though I made a joke along with it).
"OOH! A piece of candy. OOH! A piece of candy."
-James Woods
Triforce is from Zelda
When Link gets the full triforce he becomes more powerful.
/nerddddd
With the 18th pick of the 2010 NFL Draft the Pittsburgh Steelers select Florida QB Tim Tebow. (not a RB!)
by John Stephens on Mar 16, 2010 1:56 PM EDT up reply actions
I played Zelda on the N64, and didn't even get halfway through it
I play Ratchet and Clank, GTA, Bulletproof, Hitman 2, SoCom 2, and True Crime: New York. On a PS2, even…
"OOH! A piece of candy. OOH! A piece of candy."
-James Woods
Loved Zelda as a kid...
I had it for original Nintendo, it was gold… freaking gold. No other games had the flash of Zelda, Link (it’s sequal) was a sad joke.
"One important key to success is self-confidence. An important key to self-confidence is preperation."
-Arthur Ashe
by NYSteelersFan4 on Mar 16, 2010 2:03 PM EDT up reply actions
weird
I just got done playing link to the past again on my emulator. Aside from that, my video game knowledge doesn’t extend past Madden.
hahaha
With the 18th pick of the 2010 NFL Draft the Pittsburgh Steelers select Florida QB Tim Tebow. (not a RB!)
by John Stephens on Mar 16, 2010 1:41 PM EDT up reply actions
not argueing about parenting brother
read the post,
Im argueing about how parents shouldnt be held accountable for their children looking up to sucsessfull athletes as role models.
Athletes are marketed as role models and they should be held responsable for their actions.
If you get payed 8 mil a year try not to rape, shoot, run over any body. Dogs are pets and drugs are for pharacists
bring Dawk & Westy home
The point he is making is
if you stay the role model for your kids they are less likely be looking for another. If you stay on top of things you can make their taste for the crude unpalatable.
"A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty." - Winston Churchill
technically you are
You are arguing against the role of a parent being involved with their kids and instead making the athletes responsible for affecting kids. You want it to be ok for kids to idolize imperfect people who will, no matter hard they try not to, always let you down at some point.
Steelers football is 60 mins.
by tannofsteel84 on Mar 16, 2010 4:15 PM EDT up reply actions
Not near impossible
How can you put this on the athletes? So its their responsibility to raise our kids? If that is the case then the rule should be if your have trouble with the law you should be kicked out of the NFL. Why would you accept people who don’t have the maturity to not get in trouble into the league? The NFL doesn’t care too much about the maturity of the players and their morals. They care about dollar signs. They know that people eat this, ‘The athletes should be mature and own up to the responsibility of being a role model.’ So in their contract does it say you must be a role model for kids? What is their responsibility other than to play football? It is not their job to teach our kids. We cannot ‘pass the buck’ to athletes to show our kids the right way. That is what parenting is all about. Thats the responsibility you are speaking of and to place the blame on the athletes for not being a good role model is misguided. Its another case of wanting the bad without the consequences. We want our kids to look up to these people but its their fault when the kid sees the person they admire has flaws. Everybody has flaws, its not an excuse its a fact. If you don’t tell your kids that you are lying to them. The athletes become fictional characters like the easter bunny, tooth fairy, and santa claus. The only problem is that the athletes are real we can make them do what we want them to do. They have a mind of their own and a life of their own. You are asking the athlete to uphold the perception of perfection. That is totally wrong. When ever they break that perception of perfection then kids worlds come crashing down. Its impossible for any of them to be perfect. It will be like them finding out santa claus is fake. There will be some whose imperfections will be more visible than others. You have no control over that though. So as a parents we need to use what we do have control over and that is what we teach them. It seems like people forgot what parenting is. Its not easy but we want to make it easy. The problem is parents should not wait until a story breaks out before talking to their kids. We want to push that responsibility of being a parent onto the athlete. The athlete is the scapegoat for our laziness. I understand that the reason why they get all the endorsement deals is because people do look up to them but that doesn’t make it right. Americans have this twisted up idea that everything is suppose to work in their favor, but that isn’t reality. Athletes aren’t perfect, they shouldn’t be role models. Please break the news to any kids that you know.
Steelers football is 60 mins.
by tannofsteel84 on Mar 16, 2010 10:50 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
can should be can't
Steelers football is 60 mins.
by tannofsteel84 on Mar 16, 2010 10:51 AM EDT up reply actions
whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa
santa claus is fake?
"Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt." - Abraham Lincoln
by chewiesteeler on Mar 16, 2010 1:51 PM EDT up reply actions
No just the stories about him are.....
"A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty." - Winston Churchill
Like Michael Jackson fake?
With the 18th pick of the 2010 NFL Draft the Pittsburgh Steelers select Florida QB Tim Tebow. (not a RB!)
by John Stephens on Mar 16, 2010 1:56 PM EDT up reply actions
lol my nose!!
Steelers football is 60 mins.
by tannofsteel84 on Mar 16, 2010 2:06 PM EDT up reply actions
Billie Jean!
"A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty." - Winston Churchill
I lived in the valley
and I know that the HS players were * in public restrooms back in the 60s – so do you, if you’re from Monaca, or Rochie, or BF, or NB, or Freedom, or Beaver, or Ambridge or Aliquippa or anywhere else. Your kid will experience that, too, wherever he goes to school – sex is part of the HS experience, one way or another.
My heros have always been Steelers...
Great Comments!
Great comments! I expected as much, and I’m glad to see you didn’t let me down!
Go Ravens!
go ravens?
blaspheme!!!
Steelers football is 60 mins.
by tannofsteel84 on Mar 16, 2010 11:24 AM EDT up reply actions
I forgot that Baltimore children were role models to the entire nation…oh wait…
With the 18th pick of the 2010 NFL Draft the Pittsburgh Steelers select Florida QB Tim Tebow. (not a RB!)
by John Stephens on Mar 16, 2010 11:27 AM EDT up reply actions
And Baltimore parents for that matter.
With the 18th pick of the 2010 NFL Draft the Pittsburgh Steelers select Florida QB Tim Tebow. (not a RB!)
by John Stephens on Mar 16, 2010 11:28 AM EDT up reply actions
and Baltimore players...
"OOH! A piece of candy. OOH! A piece of candy."
-James Woods
by Steel Spike on Mar 16, 2010 11:38 AM EDT up reply actions
I think they made a TV show on HBO
showing these role models of baltimore…. its on dvd you can still pick it up
Steelers football is 60 mins.
by tannofsteel84 on Mar 16, 2010 4:16 PM EDT up reply actions
That's funny. I grew up in the valley,
then went to college in B’more. Fond memories of the place, really. I remember when the Steelers destroyed the Colts in a playoff game (1975?) and just after the stands had cleared a small plane crashed into the upper deck of Memorial Stadium.
My heros have always been Steelers...
Ben's job is to win football games
not to teach your children morals. Sex in a bathroom may be tasteless, but I am sure that you have more challenging moral issues to teach your children about, like two wars, drug use, the value of education.
And I wonder what Art thought when Holmes was shooting a cop? The media just didn’t cover that stuff that same way in that era. If you think football players did not engage in stupid and tasteless sexual activities in the 70s and before, you are fooling yourself.
by RLD on Mar 16, 2010 8:32 AM EDT reply actions 3 recs
+1 bro
"A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty." - Winston Churchill
+1
Athletes shouldn’t be role models. Introduce your children at an early age to names like Abraham Lincoln, Rosa Parks, MLK Jr, Ghandi, Mother Teresa, Frederick Douglas, etc, etc.
With the 18th pick of the 2010 NFL Draft the Pittsburgh Steelers select Florida QB Tim Tebow. (not a RB!)
by John Stephens on Mar 16, 2010 10:01 AM EDT up reply actions
i'd rather introduce my kids to more badass role models
like bob knight, joey porter, and the coach who locked up their WR in a shed
why stop there?
how about Charles Manson and John Wayne Gacy?
"A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty." - Winston Churchill
by PixburghArn on Mar 16, 2010 12:48 PM EDT up reply actions
and General Lee
"A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty." - Winston Churchill
Pol Pot and Kim Jong Il come to mind as well...
"OOH! A piece of candy. OOH! A piece of candy."
-James Woods
and Hillary Clinton
"A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty." - Winston Churchill
All the above are good examples
All kidding aside Robert E. Lee IS a good role model. He fought for the South only because he did not want to fight against his home, Virginia. He owned 0 slaves from what I understand.
With the 18th pick of the 2010 NFL Draft the Pittsburgh Steelers select Florida QB Tim Tebow. (not a RB!)
by John Stephens on Mar 16, 2010 1:43 PM EDT up reply actions
I'm not talking about that cat
"A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty." - Winston Churchill
There is another General Lee?
I’m afraid to google
With the 18th pick of the 2010 NFL Draft the Pittsburgh Steelers select Florida QB Tim Tebow. (not a RB!)
by John Stephens on Mar 16, 2010 1:48 PM EDT up reply actions
Sir Charles summed it up best
with his comments on role models over the years.
I’ll leave the kids up to other people. Screeching babies make my head hurt.
I think a lot of people subscribe to that
"A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty." - Winston Churchill
Charles is my role model
Is that bad?
I don’t think so.
by StoneColdSteel on Mar 16, 2010 2:11 PM EDT up reply actions
Let's turn you green
"Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt." - Abraham Lincoln
by chewiesteeler on Mar 16, 2010 1:53 PM EDT up reply actions
Oh, and welcome to BTSC
"Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt." - Abraham Lincoln
by chewiesteeler on Mar 16, 2010 1:57 PM EDT up reply actions
Go Ravens? you should be ashamed of yourself trollboy...You're no Steelers fan.
BB hasn’t even been charged with anything. IMO if two adults wanna hump in a bathroom, car, etc…that’s their business. Now where this can get complicated is if one of them is a gold digger. I’m still thinking that this is gonna be a he-said she-said thing, but in america, you are guilty until proven innocent. That is reality. I’m still standing by BB b/c it’s the right thing to do. He hasn’t been convicted of a damned thing. If your kid’s role models are rich athletes, maybe you should help them broaden their horizons a little bit. I’m kinda with Charles Barkley on this ….I’m not a role model.
by SteelersFnRule on Mar 16, 2010 9:50 AM EDT reply actions 1 recs
HOW ABOUT THAT DRAFT
the dead horse has been beat to death already
by TheCommish on Mar 16, 2010 10:06 AM EDT via mobile reply actions
Iupati it's an "I" not an "L"
"A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty." - Winston Churchill
Censured by this Forum
I just received a “warning” over the use of “profanity” in the title of this post. I’m confused. I purposedly did NOT use the word “sex” and I certainly did NOT use profanity. Could someone connected with this site please explain my censure (I use this word as it applies to one person finding fault with another)…unless it’s “profane” to question the public behavior of a Steeler. James P. Kelly
you probably would have been better off saying sex. I thought the word in question was ‘ass’ which is pretty improper. Sex is at least a proper word.
just my two cents
That's what I was thinking was the reason maybe a warning was given
Here’s another thing to ponder. You got a warning yet you are still here and the post wasn’t deleted. So it must not have been too bad. Maybe just a warning to not cross a line the moderator thought you may soon try to cross.
"A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty." - Winston Churchill
What word was originally there?
If you don’t want to write it on here you can email it to me.
With the 18th pick of the 2010 NFL Draft the Pittsburgh Steelers select Florida QB Tim Tebow. (not a RB!)
by John Stephens on Mar 19, 2010 9:34 AM EDT up reply actions
Ben hurt himself more than anyone else.
This reputation will be pretty damned hard for Ben to live down, no matter how long he plays in the NFL. But a good way to start is for him to apologize sincerely to the team, his fans and the people of Pittsburgh. This kind of publicity we don’t need.

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