I had a chance to clinch a very rare playoff berth for yours truly with a win this weekend in the last regular season game in my fantasy league.
Sadly, however, I fell four points short (113-109), and I will be on the outside looking in, yet again.
In terms of fantasy teams, my 2011 version, Horrible Losses, was actually pretty good. They averaged 99.9 points a game, and I had a stud stable of running backs in Arian Foster
, Frank Gore
, Marshawn Lynch
and Shonn Greene. The only problem I had from week to week was figuring out what combination of backs to start--I normally started a third back in the wr/r slot because my receivers weren't the greatest this year.
What did me in this week was my decision to not start Greene. Foster and Lynch have been my horses all year, so it came down to Gore and Greene. I took a chance and went with Gore, who was going up against the Cardinals
defense. Gore actually had a pretty decent game, it was Foster who failed to perform this week, only putting up five points against the Bengals
. But what can you do? No way was I not starting Foster, he was my bread and butter all season.
Speaking of failing to perform, it didn't matter who I started at tight end this week--Jermichael Finley
and Heath Miller
combined to score -1 points. For the record, I started Finley (0 points), so I guess I made the right call there.
Oh well, 109 is pretty good. I just fell victim to the poor luck I've been experiencing for the better part of a decade.
The 99.9 points per game that my team averaged would be good enough to clinch a playoff spot without even breaking a sweat in most leagues, but unfortunately, my opponents averaged 97 points against me this season. Nothing anyone can do about that.
I scored the third most points in my league this season, but my points against was the second highest in the league. That's the kind of stuff that's been happening to me for the nine years I've been playing fantasy football. Back in 2007, I scored the second most points in my league but missed out on the playoffs because I had the most points scored against, by far.
In nine years, I've never lost fewer than six games in a season and never won more than seven. I've missed the playoffs 8 out of 9 years in my fantasy "career." That's pretty remarkable when you think about it. I figured out my all-time fantasy record (yes, I have that kind of time), and it's 50-71.
It's not like I don't know the game. My knowledge is pretty decent, and I always put effort into my teams. In all the years I've been playing, I think I've started a player that was on a bye once or twice. That's not bad, considering people neglect their teams in leagues all over the place.
My stupid brother is just the opposite. He ALWAYS wins in fantasy football. Just the other night, he called me at midnight, ecstatic, because the result of the Cowboys
clash led to him winning his first round playoff game. If he wins his league this year, it would be the 3rd or 4th time for him. Jerk!
When it comes right down to it, I must be one of the unluckiest fantasy football players of all time.
Maybe I was involved in some points shaving scandal in a former life for something.
Let's just hope I never get a job in the Steelers