Yes, it's that time of year again. Mother nature seems to be punishing me by making it snow every night and melt off every day. I'm not sure if she's after me or someone else who has offended her. Although, I can't think of how I offended her.
Have you ever seen a cat with cabin fever? It's not pretty.
So, if I seem a little crazier than normal, remember, there are outside forces at work here.
I think this is the perfect time of year, when nothing is happening and I have your strict attention, to bash the Hated Patriots (You Patriot smoochers can skip this part).
Did anyone catch Tom Brady crying because he didn't get drafted when he thought he would? No, I'm not talking about video footage from the year he got drafted, he was crying this year. OMG! Are you f*****g kidding me? Big Ben: Broken nose, hurt foot, no protection from the refs at all - NO CRYING! Tom Brady: Something that happened in the past that pales in comparison to what a lot of Americans go through, getting a job - CRYING! And, what's up with that long hair and all the fashion?
Anyway, this got me thinking about the Hated Patriots today: Specifically about their heralded ability to find guys in later rounds to build a team with, and have them perform. Now here's the part I don't get: Why hasn't ANYONE left the organization and taught the system to another team? Ever! Not one of his coaches has gone on to blow our minds by duplicating what the Hated Patriots and the supposed genius, and proven cheater, Billy-boy Belichick has done, and taught them. Why you ask? Good question. (Seriously, if you're a Patriot smoocher, move on) Because - Are you ready? - They are still frickihn' cheating! A hall of fame Quarterback and a crappy team can only get you so far (See: Payton Manning an the Colts), but after that, come on, there is no way a team does that well. Patriot defenders may say something like: "Well, you see - Excuse me, could you pass the lobsta? - Where was I? Oh yes, you see the Patriots had/have gifted playas". To which I say: Sure, they may have been physically gifted, but most of them are dumb as stones. How else can you explain a team that is that successful* with that low of a payroll? Where talking about an organization that won three championships and never-ever felt obligated to reward its best players - AND THEY TOOK IT. The players were/are STUPID! Now how do you win with a hall of fame quarterback and stupid players? You have to give them an advantage. You justify it by thinking of your team as handicapped, and then, YOU CHEAT! Still sceptical? Try this one on: How do you make a guy who cries about something so dad-gum trivial (I mean, come on, I'd say it worked out in his favor) a hall of fame quarterback? You consider him handicapped (Okay, one more: Maybe teams didn't draft him because they heard he was a crybaby).
I just picture him in some nice apartment, or house, all snuggled up to Gissel watching a rerun of the game earlier in the day, and him saying, "Did you see that? Did youseee that? That guy got within five feet of me and there was no flag!!...Unbelievable! NO...I...Am...NOT...going to cry." then his lip starts to quiver and he buries his face in Gissel's breasts and starts to cry (Now that's injustice).
Should this man get into canton and I ever get to visit, I'm taking a picture of him crying and taping it to his exhibit. I urge you to do the same.
So, another adult has forced the NFL and the NFLPA to sit down and negotiate - do you tink it will do any good? Not hardly. At the end of the day, I feel like I don't trust either side. And, I feel like when this is all said and done, the NFL will be worse off. I've joked about it, but what are we going to do if there is no salary cap and Dallas and Washington are able to purchase every player on the market, hmmm? Personally, I've already started getting into shape so I can do more outdoor activities this fall (Which has already started here, weather wise). I'm just not holding my breath for a good outcome is all I'm saying.
You want to know how crazy and bored I am? Today I read something about Charlie Sheen!... Help me!
I see that Peyton Mannig is the proud father of twins. One boy and one girl. What in the hell is he going to do with a daughter? And, what is shegoing to do with all that football knowledge? Realistically, Peyton has a chance to make her into the perfect woman. Now, if someone will just take the time to teach her to cook and clean (I kid ladies, I really do). You know this puts all kinds of pressure on Eli.
Has Terry Bradshaw started crying because his brain is turning to goo? Present tense?
I have to say, this years draft has no clear candidates. Everyone's, and I mean everyone's, drafts are so far apart that I'm totally lost. All that is left is to say a prayer to Saint Rooney (The patron saint of football. Someone start working on the designs for the medallion) and cross your fingers. Sure we've had some great, and possibly crazy, mocks right here on BTSC, but they haven't cleared anything up. At least not for me. That is not a shot at the mockers, they were brilliant, every one of them. Therein lies the problem, I was talked into drafting four or five guys in the first round. Clear as mud.
People, it's time to rant. Pick a subject and go for it. Bean has been basically carrying this site all by himself lately, with a little help from a limited cast. There is a whole group of writers I enjoy here whom I haven't seen for quite some time (Arn? Where the hell are you? Momma, get writing, love your stuff). I know there isn't much out there to write about, so make something up if you have to. Go wild, let's hear from you.
Speaking of which, do you guys want to hear the story of Punxy and the three browns, or the three Bengals?
That's all for today.