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philly pulled some straight up gangsta shit, please add to the pimp cronicles!

Please explain to me how philly ended up with three pro bowl CBs this week? How in the hell did they land Nnamdi Asomugha, aka Scrabble without anyone suspecting a thing? I find this remarkable in the twitter age that they kept this secret, only la cosa nostra has this strict a code of silence. It gets even better, with all the $ being thrown around and the $15-20mm talk for Nnamdi how in the hell did they land the best CB for Dunta Robinson's last year's contract? This is crazy and the Jets have to be saying "what the hell just happened? we've been bamboozled!" To really understand how sinister this crime is we have to look at the timeline:

Well, one CB was acquired in a straighforward burglary of Pittsburgh West. For months AZ had been warned about the upcoming crime but in the end it was fait accompli. AZ took their medicine with a smile on their face but not really sure if they were mad or happy, all they could say was "thank you very much!"  Think about it, AZ paid an Aaron Rodgers type price for an unproven QB. The eagles were patient enough to wait & wait & wait hoping that AZ would be suckers enough to pay Philly a 1st rounder and DRC. Had this happened it would have been a simultaneous grand larceny / armed bank robbery, cops would have had no choice but to put out an APB on Andy Reid. Even gangsters know that pigs get slaughtered, nevertheless, Philly waited until the last possible moment before robbing AZ. I am guessing, in an act of desperation, AZ had threatened to go after Orton.

In the meantime, while AZ was filing a police report, Philly had simulaneously entered the Nnamdi Asomugha Sweepstakes. Yet not one insider: Schefter, Mort, Silver, LaCanfora, Lombardi, Clayton ever had the Eagles in the running but the Eagles were playas from day one. Insiders even mentioned the Ravens and Tampa Bay but not once did i hear Philly, what kind of insiders are you guys? Really? You guys didn't have a clue that Philly was in the running! Insiders my ass! I guess when you are up against real gangstas you learn at the same time we do. Andy Reid is definitely down with "this thing of ours."

Commencing monday nite, the eagles let NY, Dallas, Texans, 49ers among others battle it out while telling Nnamdi's agent early that they would pay market (meaning they would top the last & final deal). That's gangsta and pimpin too, sit back and let the others do all the heavy lifting, then pounce at the last minute. It's akin to stealing $100mm from other bank robbers as they are making their getaway! Eagles really screwed the jets and cowboys, Jets were so smittent they restructured 5 contracts before they realized they were being played for suckers, aint that a bitch! How pissed off are Rex and Tannebaum? You know rex took his cellphone earpiece off in a fit of anger and stomped on it with his slimmed down fat ass! Huge amount of wasted time! And possibly an even bigger opportunity loss because they might have to pay Cromartie or Assante $10mm a year. wouldn't that be a double gut shot!

The cowboys, 49ers and jets must be kicking themselves for getting played? At least the Texans were smart, they knew they had no chance so they jumped on jonathan joseph, now those are real poker players who can read between the lines. Props to John Stephens, his spidy sense told him that something was just not right in the NY Jets story. And i should have seen it too, it doesn't take that long to make a decision, after 24 hours pull your offer and move on. In  a bidding war, leaving an open ended offer on the table is a surefire way to get royally screwed.  Jets made the most basic mistake in business, they fell in love with the merchandise they were buying. This is a no-no and every merchant knows it, it's business and you have to be cold blooded.

Had the eagles had the time, i am convinced that they would have pulled off the Nnamdi deal 1st and then forced AZ to give them DRC and a first rounder. Because after pulling off the Nnamdi deal, you have to be a little worried you are playing poker against phil ivey and you are the mark. But alas, even the hardest gangstas know everyones gotta eat.  it is unclear if Assante or DRC are even on the market, but if they are please observe Philly as they really play the next mark, you just have to wait for it.  You almost can't lose when you put yourself in this good of a position. In this game of musical chairs there are not enough good CBs to go around and the Eagles have 3 pro bowlers? Again, i still can't believe it!

I thought Belicheck was the one to take advantage of other fools like Dan Snyder but he doesn't deal in the prime merchandise, he is a bottom feeder (although he is definitely a gangsta too, when was the last time you heard a trade rumor about NE? NEVER!). BB has grapefruit balls but Andy Reid has medicine balls, anyone can pull the trigger when there is no competition and you are getting soup scraps for next to nothing. It's a lot harder to pull the trigger when you are talking about grade A5 Kobe beef at for $500/lb. Andy Reid just taught Rex Ryan a lesson on how to be a playa, rule #1: Keep your mouth shut! Rex had his whole organization out there all excited and talking about a future with Nnamdi all over TV and radio. You got everyone so worked up that this is now an emotional letdown to the team and a huge letdown to their fanbase! What the hell are you doing? How can you let this happen? Rex, let this be a lesson, you can predict a SB win but you cannot go around wearing your intentions on your sleeve in a high stakes poker game, you will lose every time. The Reids, Tomlins and Bellichecks will slaughter you!

What Philly did today was best described as animalistic. Like an eagle swooping down from the sky to snatch a freshly caught salmon right out of a grizzlie's huge trap and dropping a big deuce on his face while soaring into the sky. You can just imagine rex as the bear, pissed off but confused as to what really happened. Trying to shake the bird crap out of his eyes:)

If that aint some gangsta shit i don't know what is!

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