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Steelers vs. Seahawks, Week 2: Bold and Bizarre predictions for Steelers vs. Seahawks

Much to the chagrin of most, BTSC’s Nostradumbass predicts the Steelers’ return home to Heinz to host the Hawks.

Pittsburgh Steelers v Seattle Seahawks Photo by Stephen Brashear/Getty Images

The Steelers return home and look to save face with a win over Seattle in their home opener. Many questions arose in the crappy loss to the Patriots in Foxboro last week. With that being said...Will Sean Davis solidify the secondary should he return? Will the Steelers be ready for prime time, even though the game is at 1 p..m.? Did Ben Roethlisberger shake off the rust? Will Donte Moncrief be targeted 72 times, despite dropping everything in sight last week?

With these questions, story lines, and more, I’ve compiled a list of predictions (some basic, and some utterly idiotic) to look for in this preseason contest:

  • The same dude that bought a Tuzar Skipper jersey shows up to Heinz Field sporting a Minkah Fitzpatrick jersey, killing all chances of the Steelers acquiring the Dolphins’ safety in a trade.
  • Chris Boswell misses a 39-yard field goal, Steeler fans argue whether Whitesnake’s “Here I Go Again”, “Oops! I Did It Again” by Britney Spears or “I Missed Again” by Genesis should emanate from the speakers every time No. 9 appears.
  • James Conner rushes 24 times for 131 yards on the day.
  • Matt Feiler and Ramon Foster are sent back to the locker room by officials for violating the league uniform code for dressing like a matador and a Dementor from Harry Potter respectively in anticipation of Jadaveon Clowney’s presence.
  • Devin Bush records less tackles in his Heinz Field debut, but successfully shadows Russell Wilson during the afternoon.
  • The Steelers don’t record a sack on the day. But they do force two turnovers.
  • JuJu Smith-Schuster scores a TD and celebrates what would have been the 162nd birthday of President William Howard Taft by miming getting stuck in a bathtub.
  • Since his Jets play on MNF, Le’Veon Bell shows up to the Penn Avenue Fish Company and serenades confused customers with an unintelligible, rap version of Happy Birthday to Seahawks coach Pete Carroll on his 68th birthday.
  • Coach Mike Tomlin unveils a new catch-phrase during the post-game presser. It is a doozie.
  • The Steelers play well and prevail 27-16.

Will any of this actually happen? I’ll bet at least one or two. Heck, maybe every one of them. Be sure to post your predictions — basic or bizarre — below.