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Steelers vs. Colts, Week 12: Bold and Bizarre predictions for Steelers vs. Colts

Much to the chagrin of most, BTSC’s Nostradumbass predicts the Steelers’ matchup vs. the Indianapolis Colts.

NFL: Pittsburgh Steelers at Philadelphia Eagles Eric Hartline-USA TODAY Sports

The Pittsburgh Steelers are set to travel to the Midwest to take on the Indianapolis Colts for Week 12 action. Indy is already on their second head coach, but still has a way outside shot at the playoffs. With inquiries, story lines, and more, I’ve compiled a list of predictions (some basic, and some utterly idiotic) to look for in this challenging home contest.

For those new to the article, I sometimes come close, but ultimately whiff on most of my predictions. Let’s see if I can get lucky this week.

  • Art Rooney II and Jim Irsay converse before the game with the Colts’ owner suggesting a bet in which the winning team gets the other team’s starting quarterback. In a strange move not allowed by the NFL, the Steelers try to name both Mason Rudolph and Mitch Trubisky starters.
  • Ben Roethlisberger calls his own press conference to remind Kenny Pickett that 17 years to the day, he and the Steelers lost 26-7, realizes that the anniversary is nothing to brag about, and abruptly excuses himself to go see a man about a horse. He then proceeds to buys the Colt’s mascot, Blue.
  • Upon hearing that Blue was criticized for lewd behavior during the Eagles’ game-winning touchdown last week, former Steelers wide receiver Antonio Brown emerges and proclaims, “Hold my phallic-shaped gummies”.
  • Kenny Pickett goes 28 for 44 and 280 yards.
  • The Steelers rookie QB1 actually throws two touchdowns and is not intercepted once.
  • Pat Freiermuth catches 9 balls.
  • George Pickens catches a touchdown pass and to celebrate the touchdown and the 25th Anniversary of the final episode of “Beavis & Butt-head” on MTV, pulls his jersey over his head in tribute to Beavis’ “Cornholio” act.
  • The Steelers get called for “illegal man down field” twice.
  • Stephen Sims seemingly returns the opening kickoff for a score, but it is called back.
  • Najee Harris gains 111 yards on the ground and scores a touchdown.
  • The Steelers get four sacks, two by T.J. Watt, one by Alex Highsmith and another by Montravius Adams
  • Damontae Kazee and Levi Wallace pick off Matt Ryan, but the Steelers defense still surrenders three touchdown passes.
  • The Steelers rushing defense keeps Johnathan Taylor in check.

The Steelers get two touchdowns on the day, and two field goals from Matthew Wright. The Steelers win 20-19.

Will any of this actually happen? I’ll bet at least one or two. Heck, maybe every one of them. Be sure to post your predictions — basic or bizarre — below.