Steelers Nation got a lot of laughs over Memorial Day weekend from the theft of Kenny Pickett’s car and playbook. Maybe I’ve been reading too much Encyclopedia Brown and watching too much Scooby-Doo, but I feel like there’s more than meets the eye to this seemingly open-and-shut case. In their efforts to submit stories before kicking off a holiday weekend, the local Pittsburgh media left a number of unanswered questions. So let’s do some keyboard sleuthing!
The guy who stole the car is the kenny pickett of stealing cars... HE HAD BARELY 1 GOOD DRIVE!!! pic.twitter.com/cSWCr2Tq9u— J Christ (Not that one) (@SuniRoz) May 27, 2023
First, Kenny wasn’t driving some run of the mill Hyundai, as many on social media seem to believe. This was a Genesis GV70 SUV, which can be a $60,000-$78,000 automobile. Kenny has been in partnership with The Power of Bowser since 2021, when they gave him a GMC Sierra pickup while he was as Pitt.
The local reporters all said Kenny was at Bowser doing “advertising,” but it was obvious that he was there for an interview with 93.7 The Fan. The station has a live studio at the dealership, but it’s not exactly a public attraction, at least not on this day. For instance, when the morning team was on the air earlier that same day, the showroom was pretty empty.
It takes about 22 minutes to get from Acrisure to Bowser, and it’s my understanding that the players can leave the stadium by 2p. Kenny’s arrival at the dealership was probably not before 2:30pm. Police say the suspect arrived at 1pm, so it’s very likely he watched Kenny pull into the lot.
At 3:20pm, police say the suspect took off with the SUV. Were the employees instantly aware that a crime had taken place? That details remains unknown, but Bowser called police just after 4pm. In that 40 minutes, they had already reviewed the security footage and obtained the suspect’s name from the vehicle’s VIN that he left behind.
At the exact moment that the dealership was contacting police, Kenny was on the air for an hour-long interview. One might think that this would be a big promotional event, but there are no fan pics of the event, because there are no fans there. Bowser also posted no pics. Fair enough. Maybe Kenny didn’t want the attention. But what I find even more fascinating, is that neither Kenny nor The Fan even mention the crime. This dramatic event just happened right under their noses, and no one said a word?
The big question I have is, did Kenny leave the car unlocked with the key inside? I’ve made that dumb mistake before. I searched for evidence that could answer the question. I found a clip with Kenny’s phone on the table. If you forward to the :10 mark, you’ll see Kenny in full profile. Does it look like the remote opener is in his right pocket?
What happened next, 2 miles away, was just as perplexing. The search for the stolen car ended as soon as it started. As Bowser was contacting Monroeville police, someone had already reached out to Murrysville cops. According to WPXI, the suspect started an argument with someone on a nearby bike trial. Was he trying to stash a stolen car? Who knows, but it was serious enough for someone to call police.
In the middle of all of this, neighbors say the suspect ditched the SUV to chase after his dog, and apparently another neighbor drove the now abandoned car back to the suspect’s driveway, where police found it.
The suspect is back in court on Monday, where hopefully more details will be revealed. Until then, the mystery continues!
Kyle Chrise is the host of “What Yinz Talkin’ Bout.” New episodes air every Thursday.