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Random Thoughts From a Black and Gold Mind: Week 5

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Go inside the mind of a mad man, or just a Pittsburgh Steelers fanatic. Be warned, it can get strange in here!

Charles LeClaire-USA TODAY Sports
My random thoughts seem to be a lot happier after a dominant win, so let me share the tornado of nonsense that seems to ravage my cranium like a twister in a trailer park or me at a buffet.

But first, I need to apologize to the following entities that I may have offended and last weeks column...

* People who suffer from PTSD
* Director Gerrin Keith and the creators of "Diff'rent Strokes"
* People who cry while spreading condiments on bagels
* Losers who berate NFL players for ruining their Fantasy leagues
* "Pittsburgh Dad" for correctly accusing them of comic ineptitude
* Anybody who donned the Don Johnson duds in the 80s
* Ralph Macchio
* Wham!
* Andrew Ridgely, for not mentioning him
* The actor who portrayed Chuck Cunningham on "Happy Days"
* Andy Reid's eating habits

and

Anybody who couldn't get the theme from "Diff'rent Strokes" out of their heads.

Now for those random thoughts...

* To me, a 3-1 start is always quite positive. If a team replicates their first quarter performance throughout the entire season, it's a 12-4 season. Just like 2-2 could replicate to 8-8. However, that doesn't usually work in that fashion. New factors and roadblocks pop up every week, potentially swaying the season in a different direction.

* I root for wins first, but I really wanted to see Ben Roethliesberger rack up seven TDs on SNF. Ben spread the ball around like candy at Halloween. With the exception of the two lineman deemed eligible on certain plays (Ryan Harris and Chris Hubbard), every single pass catcher was targeted and caught a pass on Sunday. With 11 TDs thrown, Ben shares the league lead with Matt Ryan of Atlanta. No. 7 has a Rambo-like arsenal at this juncture and like the muscle-bound vet in the 1985 classic, he's going to be tough to stop.

* While not having lined up in the same backfield so far, having DeAngelo Williams and Le'Veon Bell on the field at the same time is like having two dates to the prom and they both know it. (Not like most-every episode of Three's Company when Jack Tripper tried to juggle two women on the same night at the Regal Beagle and always get caught). It's hard to account for everybody and if Le'Veon is being shadowed, D-Will is going to slice a defense up.

* It is also nice to see D-Will not be relegated to the bench and subsequently ignored like last year. Even though his carries went down considerably as expected, the touchdown was proof that he's deemed valuable by the team.

* Although Antonio Brown's dances seem more tame than what you would see at most High School Homecomings, the league has deemed them sexually suggestive. That's like saying that the Steeler fans wearing a ten-year-old, Hines Ward knockoff and cargo shorts is dressing provocatively. As much as Antonio entertains me, the dancing has to stop if it is going to mean a 15-yard penalty. AB's brand is already "booming", an end zone dance isn't necessary if it could mean a loss.

* It's obvious to me that the pass rushing woes equate to collateral damage of a defensive game plan. The hounds were not unleashed for the first three games. But when the directive finally was to go after the QB,  magic happened. This is virtually the same personell that was third in the NFL with 48 sacks last year. Sure, Bud Dupree is injured and Steve McClendon is in Jets green, but those guys didn't rack them all up themselves. When given the opportunity, Cam and company can roll heads.

* I heard a radio promo with Brett Keisel inviting fans to go hunting with him and current Steelers in November. Is this a good idea? Do we really want some yinzer shooting Deebo in the butt. The way injuries are going, risking seeing "gunshot wound" on the injury report is not a good idea. Although it wouldn't be the first time in Pittsburgh, Joey Porter achieved that distinction in 2003 after being "Forrest Gumped" outside of a Denver night club.

* "Next Man Up" is working once again in Pittsburgh. B.J. Finney, Jordan Dangerfield, Darius Heyward-Bey and Vince Williams all contributed mightily in Sunday's victory. Deep teams win down the stretch.

* The one guy that it seemed like the Steelers couldn't do without was Ryan Shazier, but Vince Williams made his absence more manageable with 16 tackles and a sack. Shazier is still the guy, but Williams is the best insurance policy at linebacker in the league. I can't think of a 3-4 defense that Vince couldn't start on.

* Who would've thought a month ago that the TE position was going to be a strength of the team? Jesse James and Xavier Grimble have played way above fan's expectations. What seemed like disaster when Ladarius Green went out, turned in to an opportunity to let the young guys shine. Between the two, 15 balls have been caught for 130 yards and three touchdowns. If a healthy Green emerges for Week 7, the TE stable will be even deeper.

* The flight of the bumblebee jersey is making it's final approach in Pittsburgh. It has got to be one of the most unique jerseys in the league. It's going to be tough to top, but if they go "Batman" from 1967, that would be epic.

* I was skeptical, but Artie Burns play has been encouraging. Sure, he has committed quite a bit of pass interference infractions, but he also leads the team with four passes defensed. The first rounder from "the U" has also improved on his tackling as well. For missing most of his first preseason, Burns is learning well on the job,

And finally...
I wonder what Justin Hartwig is doing these days.

Until next week, don't be afraid to alter the lyrics to the Elton John classic...Buh-buh-buh-Bennie beats the Jets.