As always, Steeler thoughts are swirling around my head like a nerd's head in a toilet bowl. Ahem. Not that I would know anything about that. Ahem.
But before we get down to "bidniss", I feel compelled to again issue apologies to those I may have offended last week.
- The (break a) Hip-Hop stylings of Chris Berman and the Monday Night Countdown Crew
- My balding classmates' poor dance moves (Grady not yours-your moves are awesome)
- The excruciating anticipation of waiting on results of a home pregnancy test
- Food servers who complain on social media about bad tips
- TMZ for equating them to ESPN
- Bad Tippers...
And Billy Joel.
Please accept my humble apologies and please do not pull a George Costanza and tell me to "stuff my sorries in a sack!"
Here are my "Random Thoughts" for the week.
- Statistically, Ben Roethlisberger had a terrible game against Cincy. But what I saw was a quarterback battling the elements and a good defense. He knows how to maneuver his way out of trouble and he helped lead his team to victory. You don't need pretty to win every week, go to any bar on a weekend and you'll find that to be true. Wins are much more important than fantasy stats.
- Speaking of stats. There were some with the opinion that Deangelo Williams didn't have a great game due to his YPC being at 3.0. Deangelo addressed that when he intimated that he'd rather have 3.0 and a win, as opposed to 7.0 and a loss. This guy is on a mission to win a Super Bowl. Que up the Charlie Sheen audio..."Winning!!!"
- Every time I see the promo for Narcos on Netflix, I get excited because I hear "Renegade". But soon my excitement subsides when I realize there are no highlights of the Steeler defense. My bet is that James Harrison could have found Pablo Escobar much easier. Just once, I'd love to see video of Deebo slamming the Colombian drug lord to the turf.
- We haven't seen much of Artie Burns, but what we've seen so far has been encouraging. Sure, there have been missed tackles and a penalty. But the "Other AB" looked really good on thwarting and deflecting a sure touchdown in the end zone. That's why he was drafted.
- Ladarius Green says he wants to play in Week 7. With the way that Jesse James and Xavier Grimble are catching the ball, combined with the blocking ability of David Johnson, where do you put him? It's like the "Big Bang Theory" cast with an extra Howard. Don't get me wrong, I love the comic stylings of Simon Helberg as much as the next guy, but I don't need another one in the mix. We still need to hear plenty from Sheldon, Leonard and Raj. At this point, anything you get from Green is merely extra gravy or hot fudge.
- If the over/under is 15 for AB targets on Sunday, do you take the over? I think so. The odds of AB following up a subpar game with another is like me getting back-to-back dates in high school. Now wedgies, that's a different story.
- When you don't hear the names of your lineman brought up too much in a game, that's a good thing. That means that they are playing well. It's like not getting called into the boss' often for a couple of months. Anonymity is sometimes good.
- When the game is "out of hand" in the Steelers' favor, I'd rather not see much of DeAngelo Williams. Bring in Fitz Toussaint or Darryl Richardson. It's like hanging out with relatives you favor the least at the end of family parties. You used up all of your good material on the starting relatives (the ones you like) and you need to give the reserves (the weird relatives) some attention. You might as well not risk injury (or getting your wife mad), plus you get to say that you got everybody in the game. I'm out of metaphors on this one.
- Six Steeler Legends are on the eligible-list for enshrinement in Canton. Alan Faneca is the next to don a gold jacket. Hines Ward will get in, but he's going to be made to wait. I think Bill Cowher deserves to get in, but I'm not sure about whether he gets the call. Then there are Joey Porter, Levon Kirkland and Gary Anderson. All great Steelers, but I don't think any of them go in. Think about it this way, Jerry Seinfeld never took home an Emmy and he was portraying himself.
- The Steelers not winning in Philadelphia since 1965 is daunting and the equivalent of my romantic life after ten years of marital bliss. I expect the Steelers to go into Philly this weekend and halt their drought in the City of Brotherly Love. As for me, I'm expecting pop singers to band together real soon and perform a benefit concert for my drought. More like the City of Self.....no better not type it.
- Speaking of Philly, does anybody from either metropolis consider the other as being in the same state? We may be nestled in the same diagram on the map, but the cultures seem to be as different as 1970's Michael Jackson nose and 1990's MJ Schnozzola.
- Despite the 2-0 record, there seems to be major concern over the lack of sacks. I think it's all scheme design. This is virtually the same defense that recorded a third-best 48 last season. Don't fret, Keith Butler knows what he's doing. I think the pass rush gets unleashed this weekend. I know it feels as boring as a non-French Kiss. But don't worry, there are going to be tons of tongues in Tonsil-town soon.
- Kudos to the Steelers organization and players that honored military veterans during Heroes at Heinz Field on Tuesday night. Seeing players like Alejandro Villanueva among fans that also served our country was beautiful.
- If Marcus Wheaton returns this weekend, expect even more potency in the offense. Think of it as adding a fourth Ghostbuster. Venkman, Egon and Ray Stantz were great, but when Ernie Hudson joined the crew as Wintson Zeddmore...Gozer didn't stand a chance.
I wonder what Delton Hall is doing these days.
Until next week,
Obey the Outfield. If Josie is indeed on a vacation far away, don't hesitate to "come around and talk it over."