Random Thoughts From a Black and Gold Mind: Offseason Nonsense edition

The season is still over. I'm having trouble getting behind Philly, even though my conscience tells me to watch the Puppy Bowl and binge watch Hot in Cleveland instead. Having nine players and a full coaching staff represent my team at the Pro Bowl is like that two a.m. hookup...it's good enough, but it's not good enough. With that being said, my black-and-gold mind is filled to the rim with the proverbial Brim.

As always, I share the ravings with you. But first, I must freshly squeeze an orchard of oopses for those I offended and why in last week's edition.

• John Oates (even though I vehemently defended him)
• Keyser Soze
• Calling Keith Butler a patsy
• Anybody who still has a giant Zach Morris celly
• That awful picture of Elvis
• Brett Keisel's beard

And now, Random Thoughts...

• Mike Tomlin won a game late in January for the first time in seven years. It was much like a typical Steeler of late 2017. The defense fell down early (except this defense was loaded with talent), Ben threw a pick-six, they fell down 21-3 early and Chris Boswell saved the day with his leg. If I want deja vu, I'll put on a Dionne Warwick LP.
• I'm beginning to wonder if Le'Veon Bell has an app on his phone that helps him decide each day what to tell reporters about his contract status. His comments are more inconsistent than a 1970's coin-operated motel bed.
• I guess I'm glad to hear that contract talks are going better than last year. But then again, should I be? I conducted a poll on a BTSC column about a week ago and the fans were going three different directions, kind of like the popular vote between Bush vs. Clinton vs. Perot in 1992 (I know the vote wasn't entirely that close, so you don't need to look up the results in Wikipedia. It was 44.9M to 39M to 19M). With nearly 4,800 votes counted, 20% of fans want Bell to remain in Pittsburgh on a long-term deal, 41% want the Steelers to franchise him and run the wheels off of him for one season and 38% think the Steelers should let him walk. There's an argument for what's behind all three curtains. Somewhere in the great beyond, Monty Hall is laughing his toupee' off.
• Todd Haley as a Brown seems fitting. If you think he's not going to pull every gimmick out of the arsenal like a Weird Al concert, you're sadly mistaken. I think the Browns and Steelers could split next year.

Denny Medley-USA TODAY Sports

• Trey Griffey, a 6-foot-3, 209-pound WR, has been signed to a futures contract by the Steelers. Ken Griffey Jr's son caught 79 passes for 1,241 yards and six touchdowns in four seasons at the University of Arizona. So, even the Steelers sign players with better baseball pedigree than the Pirates. Wonder if the Penguins are scouting offspring of the 2004 Red Sox to play on their third line.
• I'd be surprised if the Steelers bring back William Gay, J.J. Wilcox and Mike Mitchell. This is a case where the release of veterans in the secondary wouldn't hurt as much as one would think.
• The Steelers need help at ILB and there are a few amazing first round options available in the draft, like Alabama's Rashaan Evans. On the free agent landscape, Navarro Bowman is an option. However eating fried Oreos for dinner are a more healthier option than Bowman.

Matthew Emmons-USA TODAY Sports

And finally,

• I wonder what Bo Orlando is doing these days.

Until next time, breathe in these lyrics sung nearly naked in front of an entire Naval fleet in 1989 by Cher...

If I could turn back time

If I could find a way

I’d take back those words that hurt you

And you’d stay

I don’t know why I did the things I did

I don’t know why I said the things I said

Love’s like a knife it can cut deep inside

Words are like weapons, they wound sometimes

I didn’t really mean to hurt you

I didn’t want to see you go

I know I made you cry, but baby

If I could turn back time

If I could find a way

I’d take back those words that hurt you

And you’d stay

If I could reach the stars

I’d give ‘em all to you

Then you’d love me, love me, like you used to do

If I could turn back time

Seriously ponder the significance of that, Go Steelers and Don't Stop Shalievin'.