Happy draft day, 2016!
Are you seriously excited? I only ask this because I've read numerous times over the past few years that you may actually view the NFL Draft as your Christmas morning (and I guess, evening). Do you have butterflies in your stomach as you anticipate the event kicking off this evening at 8 p.m.? More importantly, are you REALLY looking forward to about two hours after either Carson Wentz or Jared Goff's name is called, and the Steelers finally get to make their pick at 25?
Are you in an especially good mood right now, and are people asking you why you're smiling? When you answer, do you tell the truth, or do you have to make something up like, "Oh, I got lucky last night."?
What's the charts and/or graphs situation for your draft day? Do you have your own big board in your living room, or does the wife/girlfriend make you keep it in your man cave? Do you use some sort of computer program to rank your prospects?
What about your attire? Are you wearing anything black and gold, today? If you are wearing something in those colors, but it's not so obvious that it's meant to celebrate the Steelers' eventual number one draft pick, are people coming up to you and screaming, "Go Pens!"?
What about black and gold face paint, are you wearing face paint--for the draft and not the Penguins? (Be honest.)
How about snacks? Did/will you go to the store and buy a big bag of chips and some dip? Will you order a big hoagie with all the trimmings? How about multiple pizzas? Have you sent out a Facebook invite alerting friends and family of the draft extravaganza you're having at your pad? How many people have clicked "yes"? What about "maybe"? (Don't you just hate the "maybes"? They think they're so smug with their options.)
Will you go to a local establishment that has lots of flat-screen TVs in-order to watch the draft and throw down a few? Do you think more people will be watching the draft at this establishment or Game 1 of the NHL Eastern Conference semifinals between the Penguins and Capitals?
Has a significant other tasked you with an errand to perform this evening? If so, is your stomach in a knot, as you worry about whether or not you'll be able to get everything done in time for the first pick to be announced? What about the Steelers' first pick?
No on both counts? Yikes. (I'd love to be a fly on the wall for that "discussion" if things don't pan out, time-wise.)
How about a favorite prospect? Will you jump for joy if, say, Andrew Billings is the Steelers' selection? Will you have to buy a new television/smartphone/laptop if Eli Apple is the pick?
Enough about you. Allow me to tell you how my draft evening will go:
I have a volleyball game at 7 p.m., where I will display speed and quickness that contradicts my age and body-type. Afterwards, I will rush home as fast as I can and log on to NFL.com and watch the draft unfold on my laptop. At the same time, I will tune into Pittsburgh sports talk radio and listen to the talking heads try to fill airtime for two-plus hours, speculating on who the Steelers' selection will be.
I will also open up another window on my computer in-order to see BTSC's live draft thread. The reason for this is two-fold: First, I just know a favorite prospect will start slipping, and the closer he gets to 25, the more people will post things like, "Come on, baby! Just two more to go!" Second, I really want to see the visceral reaction if Apple is picked.
Even though half the fun is waiting for the Steelers' selection to be announced by Roger Goodell, I'll know of the pick about 19 seconds before the commissioner even steps to the podium, thanks to Adam Schefter and everyone else on Twitter.
After the Steelers' pick is announced, I'll immediately get a text from my brother.
If it's a player and/or position he likes, he'll ask me to give my assessment. Since I'm not a draft expert, I'll simply parrot something I read about the guy on whichever draft profile I find about him on google.
If the draft choice is, say, Taylor Decker, offensive tackle, Ohio State, my brother will text, "wtf!" and I'll text back, "No idea." This kind of thing will go on for an hour or so, until we convince ourselves that Taylor is a good pick, given his first round projection.
After the pick and post-pick texting, I'll start crafting the first analytical article in my head (hopefully, I'll have good things to say.)
Enough about me.
May your draft day be filled with lots of good value picks and no reaches or busts!